No contact rule, does it work?

no contact rule, how long should you go no contact for? even though you have this urge to text your ex...

and does it work to help you get over them? will the dumper miss the dumpee with nc rule?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • In my experience, it works more for guys, and only in certain circumstances. It almost never works for girls to get a guy back, though it can help to get over them.

    "how long should you go no contact for? even though you have this urge to text your ex..."

    For ever. Do not give in to that urge. Ever.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it does. It makes sense. If the person doesn't want you now then nothing is going to change that. Right now it's over and this person doesn't want you. So anything you do is just going to push them away further. Distance however gives them time to miss you and reflect upon things. It does also help in the healing process for the dumpee. You can't move on if you keep talking to the person, keeping hope somewhere in your heart. It doesn't work. There needs to be time apart.

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    • yeah we broke up 2 weeks ago, haven't spoken to him since since he's like 'you can talk/call me anytime you want', took that as a sign to not call and message him ever hahaah

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    • That is the answer I have been looking for thank you so much!

    • @RomanceMan201 My pleasure :) Glad I could help :))

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What Guys Said 7

  • It depends on the circumstances, everyone is different, length of the relationship, etc... If he is abusive, then NC indefinitely; if he is being a jerk and taking you for granted and you are still in a relationship, a couple of days. I generally believe that the person that was the one who broke off the relationship should be the one to re-initiate contact, if you are the dumpee and try to initiate contact, then you just give the power back to him which negates the purpose of no contact. The general rule is 30 days, but this is not because you are trying to manipulate them, it is because you should be working on yourself and doing things that you have been putting off when you were in the relationship.

    Yes, it will help you get over them, time heals all wounds... and whether the dumper misses the dumpee, that is not something that can be predicted, everyone is different. If the dumper is a narcissist, then he will probably come back because he misses the attention you gave him (narcissistic supply).

    I would move on with your life, it is not worth focusing your attention until you need to focus your attention; if you try to contact him you will appear needy and desperate.

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  • HAHA My Ex have text me after one year but that was on my birthday. so if there was true love i mean mutual understanding then there is no problem to text him.

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  • How long should it last? Until you stop having the urge to call or text them.

    Yeah it helps. Can't move on if you are constantly reminded of the person you are trying to move on from.

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    • agreed.

    • haven't spoken to him since we broke up which was 2 weeks ago, even though he was like 'you can call/message me anytime you want' 'we'll catch up after exams' (exams finish this week)

  • For me No Contact is synonymous to them being "dead to you".

    In my experience so far No Contact works, but not necessarily in the way you think it.

    Sure I'd love my ex to contact me soon, because then I'd know she has been thinking about me and is missing me... but not being in contact with her has allowed to be to get back in control of my emotions that were blown apart when the break up happened.

    Being in No Contact has also allowed me to see her in a better light. I'm so used to seeing exes as complete bitches and whatever, but I see my current ex as she was before the break up - a very special person who is very dear to me.

    Bottom line is I do hope she contacts me and that we can meet up to talk it all out... but if she doesn't, at least I've got my self-respect back!

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  • I've been recently broken up with, the relationship was 1.5 years, we shared an apartment and after all of it we divided everything up accordingly. The catch is that I will be keeping her dog with me and my dog until she ends up getting her own place. While no contact has certainly been great, there are other things where communication is needed, which makes my situation a little different than yours. Generally speaking, the less contact the better for me. It really depends on your motives. If you want to get over the relationship and the ex does as well, I vote no contact.

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  • https://www. girlsaskguys. com/other/q1053892-have-you-ever-run-over-another-person-s-foot-your-foot-run-over-by

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  • It works for me, but that doesn't mean it works for everyone. :)

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