It's a year and still in denial that it's really over?

it's over a year he's moved onto several people I'm still in denial that he will come back.. my head says he won't but my stupid heart says he will.. checks emails daily and my phone non stop in the hope he says I do love you. He never did love me he said he never even liked me.. I don't check his Facebook I blocked it to save myself misery and not come across as a pyscho stalker, I know I'm hurting me he told me one girl he hooked up with cried he ran to her I cried he and another girl just laughed. Like I never mattered after over a year he spent so long chasing me I asked what I meant to him he said I was just f^ck meat. Probably why I can't move on feel I'm nothing. I hate myself he came back a few months ago just to tell me I was nothing but ugly and fat.
I feel nothing I'm dead inside and no one can help me. he's happy I'm not if after a year I still feel that way is it going to last forever becos I can't take anymore

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  • You need to seek professional help. You've seemed to initiate no contact and from your side and did your part. By now the pain should have become better but for you it seems to get worse. You don't just have anxiety over him but it seems like your entire self esteem has gone through the window too which worsens the matter. These problems need to be dealt with in person with someone who has years of training and knowledge. You are hung up on this and this guy has hurt you severely. It's going to take more than just advice to get you through this. You'll need help. Please do yourself a favor and find a reputable therapist if possible. You'll get better I promise but you need some sort of professional with this.

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    • the damage is irrepairable he has hurt me more than anyone has ever done, I've lost so much everything is a mess

    • I concur... Or as the saying goes time heals. It takes longer with some people than it does with others.

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