How long do you normally go no contact for and when do you just move on?

We took an indefinite break 2 months ago. The last time we took a break was last year and he contacted me after 1 month. This time he contacted me again but I was still so mad at him that I responded with very few words. Again instead of apologizing, he chose to email me with a stupid question, just a stupid reason to talk to me instead of trying to talk about our issues. He always does this where he doesn't want to speak of our issues but just wants to sweep it under the rug and pick up where we left off. This time I have my foot down and I refuse to speak to him unless if we are going to address our issues.

I told him this when I cut him off 2 months ago. "Contact me when you are ready to discuss and resolve our issues".

So when do I assume we are over and when do I move on? I miss him dearly and I cry so much. We dated for 2 years and I've known him for 3 years. I'm utterly confused. He seemed so in love with me and crazy about me but he never wanted to deal with our issues.

At what point do I move on?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I commend you for wanting to be insistent. That guy definitely is going to keep running away from the issues - he needs to face up to them.

    If he hasn't contacted you again after 2 months, it's safe to say that you shouldn't be expecting him to. 2 months is a pretty long time! So treat that you guys are over. Put a steel wall in front of him.

    To reaffirm your resolve and remind you of his transgressions, take a notebook, or a blog, and jot down all the issues that he refused to admit to and talk over. Jot down how he evaded the topic. Jot down how unrepentant and sly he was to try to get back to you, hoping that you had forgotten and forgiven him. It sounds like very strong adjectives to use, but remember how long he did this for and how he's so stubborn.

    Whenever your heart wavers, look at what you jotted down. And of course, get on with your life. Start seeing other guys, it'd really help you get over him.

    • I have met other guys and then I come home and cry because it makes me miss him more. I met a guy last weekend at a party and we kissed and I came home and felt sick and started crying.

      I just dont understand how he could let me go. I'm trying to move on and I do have a deadline in mind, 4 months is basically my deadline and when I know I must move on.

      thank u

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • You start to move on now. It's all you can do. If he comes back then you are in a better place to think about if you want to be in the relationship again or not. If he doesn't it won't matter because you will have moved on. You have to move on in order to be happy instead of being sad all the time waiting around for a guy, no matter how much you love him.


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