This guy was never my boyfriend. We have been close for almost two years now. We talk/text everyday. He lives about an hour away from me so I wouldn't get to see him very often but when we would hang out he would accompany me to weddings as my date, we'd go to movies, eat out at restaurants, etc. We told each other everything. The most affection he would give me was a hug at the end of the night. Well, he told me about three months ago that he now has a girlfriend. She lives in another state (about 1.5 hours away). He gets to see her on weekends cause they both work during the week. WELL, I found out tonight that he's been seeing her since the beginning of the year. We had remained strictly friends since he told me that he had the girlfriend, despite me having feelings for the guy. I had just pushed them aside cause I wanted a friendship with him, at least. But obviously he's been lying to me, directly lying to my face about how long they've been together. He told me that his gf no longer wants us to remain friends because she doesn't trust the fact that I have feelings for him. I don't know if I'm just venting or if I'm asking for advice but any and all comments are appreciated, even if they're blunt. I don't know what to do. I thought of him as one of my best friends. I'm devastated!
Most Helpful Guy
"I don't understand why if I'm JUST his friend, why he lied about how long he's been with this girl?" -
He likely just didn't know how to tell you because he knew it would hurt your feelings and obviously he cares for you. I imagine he kept putting it off until he couldn't anymore or you found out-it was unclear from your post if he told you or you figured it out or what but this doesn't matter.
" It shouldn't matter, if I'm just your friend." -
It would if that friend had feelings for you as you do him. Again, he didn't want to hurt you. This was inevitable though. I imagine he is as young as you and he simply didn't know how or when to tell you. He was torn; on the one hand he has his girlfriend, on the other he has his best friend. I don't envy this guy.
"It's just so heartbreaking to me." - Of course it is. Sounds like you might even love him.
" Again, if we're just friends, why is it such a big deal?" -
With the 5:30am texting, he cares about you and it's a habit. Humans are creatures of habit.0
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