Any suggestions, Comments, advice, on getting over an Ex?

I got dumped about 2 months ago. First week and half she (SB) was call calling and texting "I miss you" "have a good day" etc when I would do the same to her she asked for time and space. Next thing I know she unfriended me on facebook. SB said it was too hard to for her to see the pictures of us together, & that she had a lot of mixed feelings. She said we were broken up and that she needed time to sort everything out. I told her "Okay have a good day let me know if you need anything" 2-3 days later she adds me back as a friend.

I should known then just do deny the request but I still love this chick so I accepted. Couple more weeks go by and its still Hot and cold. One minute he's reaching out saying "hey", "good night" "i miss scaring you" I was trying to do the no contact but then she sends a text "So are we not talking anymore" I was dumb and replied "yes I've just been busy" next day I text her and she starts ignoring me.

About 3-4 weeks, ago she (SB) starts putting status on Facebook like "WTF", "really" "loving life" "what a great weekend" etc which she really had never done before most of her status have been about her daughter. During this whole time my friends and family have been trying to cheer me up hanging out taking me out to try and get my mind of things and of course pictures and posts with me tagged in them.

2 weeks ago I noticed that SB liked some of my status' and pictures so naturally i start browsing through hers because I still miss her and her daughter. She posted a few pictures of them and I liked them. Next thing I know I'm Blocked.
I dont understand it? Why can SB like my posts but I couldnt do the same? I miss this girl and I dont know why I can't stop thinking about her. Why?
The only time I can is when one of my ex's (KC) before her talks to me. KC & I dated off an on for 2-3 years Why is this? KC asked about the breakup and how I was doing about 3 weeks after? And I've been talking to her every day since.
I get all excited & smiley talking to her. Both flirt a bit back and forth i. e. sending emoji kisses or blowing kisses snapchat, etc. Why she the only 1, that can get my mind off my ex (SB). I've talked to others and its like I can't pay attention


Most Helpful Girl

  • Although it may be hard, I think you should just ignore SB completely. Don't let people come in and out of your life whenever they feel like it. If she really cared about you she wouldn't be messing with your mind. She's making it harder for you to move on. The double standards are just crazy. She might be trying to make you look bad. And by all the texting, she might just be trying to make herself feel better since she knows someone cares for her in her time of singleness/loneliness. Maybe KC was waiting for the day you 2 would break up because she never got over you. If KC makes you happier than SB does, go for it. At least KC hasn't been sketchy and texts you all the time. Don't get played by SB because it seems like she's trying to make you her puppet. I was in a similar situation and I just stopped with my SB & moved on to my KC. Although none of us were ever really dating, I prefer talking to my KC because I don't have to worry about the bs & I don't have to wonder if I'll be ignored out of nowhere. Hope I helped!

    • I really enjoy talking to KC, we talk about sports she gives me crap about my fav. team as I do to hers. We talk about work, the weekend, her dogs, pretty much anything but hanging out. We were off and on for about 2-3 yrs. 4-5 years ago. 1st time she wanted something more serious I didn't so we broke it off. Next time I did and she said I hard broke her heart and wasn't ready. Since then she dated others, she got out of a serious relationship last Sept/Oct. I dated others my most serious one was the one I just got out of. In between that time apart we never really hung out but we would text eachother on bdays and holidays. I want to make a move on KC maybe 3rd times the charm but I get nervous that maybe she's just being a friend and doesn't see us as more than that. I've been trying to think of way to get us to hang out not as a date but just feel each other out and see what feels like. And definitely dont want to risk losing her as a friend if thats all were ever going to be.

    • I agree with ShesCuriouslyCurious. Seems like SB is trying to keep you close until she finds someone else, and when she has you reeled in she pushes you away to maintain that boundary and control. Whenever you text back or whatever, she gets upset because she doesn't want to give you the wrong impression, she isn't interested in getting back together with you, she just doesn't want to be officially alone. When she gets responses from you, its her way of making sure you're still single, and this builds her confidence up while she searches for someone else.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Games.
    She's interested in somebody else or feels you two aren't good together. Get you another girl, learn to occupy your time by bettering yourself ya know it's corny but u get shit done and her off your mind.
    What you two had is officially over you don't deserve somebody who doesn't know 100% if they should be with u

    • I understand that the relationship is officially over. When people break up even if they get back together they should start it as something new not pick up where they left off because there was obviously something wrong in the relationship. Whats throwing me off is why is she so hot and cold. Why is it okay for her to reach out to me, for her to like my status/pics whatever on FB but when I do it she pulls away she asks for time and space, or ends up blocking me on FB. If she doesn't want me in her life then okay, I dont have to be a part of it. It makes it harder to move on. I have been working out again it feels awesome. Just need to find more things to do but a lot of my friends just want to go out and party or drink and I dont feel like doing that. Im actually proud that I haven't drunk called or drunk texted her.

    • I get you 100% and kudos for being a good guy to her. But she's just seeing if you'd fight for her now that I Reread everything. If you fight for her she will think about getting back together she's being hot n cold to cause she's sitting at home thinking damn is he thinking about me or just being nice. And your playing the game too. Message her tell her how you feel, let her know you see the hot n cold and you don't like it, and what you feel you want to do in regards to you guys relationship.
      Coming out and laying it all out will show her you want answers and determines how you'll feel about her cause she had to answer if she cares

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