Do I contact him first? Talking to ex after No Contact?

I've been in no contact right after my ex dumped me, 28 days of no contact I did.

He called my mom and they talked a whole while about the Relationship and at a certain moment he asked for my phone number. (since I changed that and deleted FB so he coulnd't contact me)

Now he has my phone number, but re added me on Skype and says 'if YOU want to talk we can talk here xx"

WHAT? I didn't break No contact ONCE, he was reaching out every now and then, and now he acts like "I" want to talk?

I've wrote back "You're not in my list anymore, and neither am I in yours... (he deleted me first) I thought you asked my mom for my phone number?"

Now he's not even answering to that on Skype, WHAT NOW? I want him back, but don't want to lower myself by chasing since I was the dumpee and I was the one doing the 28 days if No contact.

Thank you guys, very much appreciated.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • No! No! No!
    Continue not contacting him. And if he does call you do not answer! He's already playing games with you and effing with your head. The fact that he isn't replying to you after he contacted you first proves that he just wanted to know that you're still hung up on him. He doesn't want you he just wants an ego boost knowing that you still want him.
    I have been there but with my ex husband of 12 years. It was a horribly abusibe relationship and I left him many times over the years. But every time I kept talking to him and eventually he would sweet talk me back. Promising he'd change and it would be different this time. And it did change, it always got worse. Finally, when I left him four years ago I immediately changed my number, blocked him from all social media, and have no contact with him still. I also moved 1000 miles away from him but that was for safety reasons in my case.
    My 20 year old daughter is going through the same thing. This guy breaks up with her, she leaves and starts to get herself together then he calls her and it starts all over again.
    So, please, for your sake, don't talk to him, ever. Take time to heal and get strong and eventually the right guy who actually loves and respects you will come along. I promise!

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    • Thank you for the help.

      I just sent back "I don't have you on my list anymore, neither do you (since he deleted me after the break up), I thought my mom gave you my number?"

      After that he never responded, neither did I, I didn't make any bad mistakes by just sending that, right? It's not like he got a big ego boost from the answer I gave? (hopefully)

    • Saying that wasn't bad. But from now on stay strong and don't talk to him anymore. I know it's hard when you care about someone and all you want is for them to care back but he won't ever give you what you want/ nees.
      The best and healthiest thing for you to do is get back on your feet, figure out what you want to do and someday when you least expect it thean who is meant for you will come along :)
      If you find yourself wanting to contact him call on of your good friends instead, go for a jog, bake something, do something creative. Anything that takes some time to do and you'll get so involved with what you're doing the craving for talking to him will subside.
      Stay strong girl! You can do it!!! :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Keep your pride and dignity. Don't reach out. Don't talk to him. Why be with someone that has taking you so for granted and treated you this way. You deserve better.

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  • He is playing games with you and making you want him. Kinda sick thing for him to do. If I was you I would keep the no contact thing going because you are better than him.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think he wants you to chase him and beg to have him back. Don't do it. Hold your head high. If he wants to talk to you make him sweat for that honour.

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  • Don't contact him again.

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