Unsure of what I should do with my Ex-Girlfriend. Any advice would be awesome!!?

So here is the situation that I am currently facing. My ex and I have been dating for a little over 2 1/2 years. We have an amazing connection that neither of us have shared with anyone else. For the last 9 months I have been faced with a financial crisis and I did not handle it well. I was barely keeping my head above water with bills, not to mention that I did not have the money to shell out for dates that I wanted to take her on, or trips that we wanted to go on. So around 3 1/2 weeks ago she becomes very cold and distant and finally I asked her what the deal was. She told me that she was done! She couldn't handle our situation anymore and that she cares for me and loves me but she couldn't do this anymore. Now of course I am heartbroken because this is the woman of my dreams and everything has come crashing down around me. We live in the same apartment building and we have run into each other a couple of times (I admit one time I did crack and told her how I felt after about 2 weeks) but for the most part I have done NC for the last 3 1/2 weeks.

Her BFF tells me that she is only doing what is best for her financial and what is necessary to secure her future. I am currently focusing on myself and working my butt off (60 hours per week) to get myself back to financial independence. I am working out and trying to stay busy but I cannot get her off of my mind. If this were any other women I would have simply learned from this, licked my wounds and would have walked away by now. However, I believe down to my very soul that this girl is my match in every way possible, and I cannot give up on us.

I need advice on where to go from here. I want her back so badly but I want to do it the right way, and if you think I should just walk away, then let me know. Either way, I want for both of us to be happy.


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What Girls Said 2

  • Forget about her! She don't want ya when your broke then why would you want her when she wants your money? She could be just as stable financially with you as she could be without you.

  • If she loved you she would have understood your situation. Were you working hard to improve your financial position? If so then I don't think you deserve her as your gf as she wasn't supportive of you. In this case you probably should just leave things. It's hard to get over someone you love but it always gets better with time. You need to do things to take your mind off her and over time you will start to heal. But to begin you need to fully realise that she wasn't right for you. That's when your friends/family is needed to snap you out of it.

    If however you weren't really trying hard at all to improve your financial position and just sort of gave up then I can understand why she left... and if this was the case then you need to obviously change, show her that you are working hard to improve your situation and hope that she will give you a chance again.

    • I was working very hard to improve my financial situation. but it just seemed like I would hit a dead-end with a job prospect, or my job would be a temp job for only a month, things of this nature. I am a very driven person but I can understand to a point where she is coming from. A financially unstable man is unattractive to say the least. This whole thing just happened at the worst time possible and now I have to deal with the aftermath and sometimes it is more than I can take.

    • Given that you were very driven at the time I think she should have been supportive of you! Every time you had to end up looking for a new job she should have been there to support you and offer help in any way she can. You guys should have been a team right? I get that you still have strong feelings for her but if she gave up on you like that then don't you think it shows that she didn't care enough about you? Shouldn't you deserve better? Even though that's hard to hear now you'll probably agree with me in the years to come.

      I'd say walk away. Focus on your energy on building your own life and finding a great stable job! The right person will come along eventually. She just didn't seem right for you.

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