say you and your boyfriend/girlfriend broke up because legally you had no other choice. for example, my boyfriend was arrested for hitting me, choking me, and pulling my hair (I didn't call the cops, other people did). I dismissed the charges and even called him afterwards so we could discuss everything that happened and see what we wanted to do. call me crazy and stupid, but I wasn't ready to move on or give up on the relationship. It took over a month for me to hear from him so I hooked up with another guy (we had sex).. it didn't mean anything it was just casual drunk sex after the bar one night.. I feel slutty and dirty for doing it but please understand the emotional state I was in and the hurt and betrayal and confusion I was feeling. I was just trying to move on. finally I heard from my ex boyfriend and we wanted to try to make things work again. he asked me if I had been with anyone sexually and I couldn't lie to him so I told him the truth. he said he has to forget I ever existed and move on with his life completely, despite the fact that he loves me and thought we would get married. we were together for 3 years and before that we were really good friends and always had a "thing" but couldn't do anything about it because I had a boyfriend. was I wrong in hooking up with another guy and trying to move on with my life? did I really do something that is so unforgiveable? if I can forgive him for what he did, he should forgive me. and I was honest with him, I could have lied but chose to do the right thing and be honest. why can't he forgive me? why is everything all my fault? he messed up too, and I forgave him.
really need opinions and advice. please be brutally honest. I feel so much guilt and I know its not right. thank you.
Most Helpful Girl
No, its not wrong. You didn't hear from him for a MONTH. That's not really normal. Not only that but HE BEAT YOU. You were hurt, emotional, and you just wanted to ease the pain. It's totally fine, you were on a break.
This is brutal honesty. YOU CAN'T GET BACK TOGETHER WITH HIM. He's violent! You know how you're emotional and hurt and crazy right now? You can't see that you're in an abusive relationship. Physical abuse is never okay. Ever. You need to get out. Seriously. I've seen too many of my friends go through this. Everything you think is so great about this guy, you will find better in another guy. One that doesn't think its okay to beat you up. You need to cut him out of your life. I'm being 100% serious. Just know that you did nothing wrong, and walk away with your head held high. If he tries to get back together with you, take it as a confidence boost.1