I need some help figuring out how to get my ex wife to open up to me. Since we split 5 mo ago she won't tell me how she feels about me or anything?

She still hasn't filed separation papers. So to me that means she may just need time. One day recently she was upset when I called to speak to my son. I said u can always talk to me and vent. So she broke down and said she's depressed, can't sleep, can't eat and is overwhelmed. She called me later that day and we spoke more which is rare. Within minutes she blew up and started yelling. Anytime I say I love u or I miss u she either doesn't reply or says its not the time. My question here is does it sound like its too painful to reciprocate my feelings or is she just done?


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What Girls Said 2

  • She really seems to be suffering from depression which shouldn't be taking lightly. She should seek the help of a medical professional and after she has worked on herself and healed from whatever she is going through then if she so chooses she can work on her relationship with you and mend it back together. She still needs your unwavering support and concern, don't give up on her!

  • Honestly, it sounds like she's done. Too much pain likely IS a factor, but it sounds as if walls are being thrown up so that she will not fall into "the habit" of being your wife. (Sorry for how fucked up that sounds, I don't know a gentler way to put it. :( )

    Now there IS a chance that you might have a second chance.. but it is a very small chance that you are best putting out of your head. First of all, because it will hold you back from moving on. Second of all, if there IS a chance, it will be destroyed by giving her the perception of being "pushed". The best thing you can do is make it clear that you are willing to listen if they decide to talk more.

    • The weird thing is I've asked her if we are done and if it would be best for me to move on and she never replies when I ask her that. A few months ago I told her I had plans to go out with some friends and she showed up and stayed the night but asked if I was gonna cancel my plans if she stayed with me

    • Well, you have a kid together, so you'll still be in contact if the day ever comes that she's ready to talk. In the meantime, pull back as best you can, let her know ONE time that you will be there for her if she needs an ear or a shoulder, and that you aren't going to ask anymore so she doesn't feel pressure.

      As soon as you are ready, start dating. It will help you get out of your head, and help make sure this doesn't drive you batto.

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