I am so devastated. I don't want to be that crazy obsessive ex girlfriend who can't get over a relationship. But I was so in love with him. He expressed feelings of wanting a future with me, and I thought we were perfect for each other. But he hasn't expressed any interest in getting back with me. I've tried talking to him, tried to find out what went wrong. He just said he needs to be alone and the relationship needs to end. Why would he feel this way? Why would he do this?
I am just lost and confused. Day after day, I am alone. I have some old friends, but we've lost touch and they all have their lives now. He was literally all I had, and he was my best friend. I've never cried so much, I feel so hopeless.
Please... what do I do to move on? It's hurts so much. Thank you.
Most Helpful Guy
There's nothing at all pathetic about anything you just said. You are not pathetic; you're understandably sad.
I'm afraid, not knowing the guy, I can't say with any certainty why he broke up with you. Trying to understand why he broke up with you might be a futile exercise, even if you deserve an answer. You might never get one.
The person who invents a pill that will make people instantly get over a relationship will be a multibillionaire in a day. I believe, NanaSakura, that time and distance is the greatest healer. I know the pain feels bigger than you right now, but day by day it will get smaller until eventually you will be bigger than the pain. Do your best to keep yourself occupied. I think exercise is a good thing. You can take up hobbies. You can try to contact your old friends. Of course they have lives of their own, but that doesn't mean their lives have to exclude you. You might find they'll be very glad to hear from you. You can also try to make new friends.
Now, you said something that was rather striking to me. You said, "He was literally all I had..." I think that there are two possibilities here. He SEEMS like he was all you had, or perhaps he really was all you had. If it only SEEMED that way, then in time you'll realize you have many things in your life. By the way, when my wife passed away I felt EXACTLY the same way. I found I was wrong. It only seemed that way. However, if he was all you had, then perhaps in future relationships you'll make sure that your boyfriend or husband does not become all you have. Cultivate friendships and interests aside from your lover. That's a project you can start today.
When my wife died, I too felt hopeless, lost, and I almost felt like a ghost myself, drifting around life like some invisible observer. I found that what George Burns (he was a famous comedian who lived to be a hundred) said about his beloved wife, Gracie, was true. "You cry and cry and cry until you stop."
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