My husband left me for another woman about 3 months ago and now he has left her for another one, there was a 19 year age difference between us but we had been married for 16 years, I don't know how to move on, he come and got his stuff last week and I ask him if this is what he wanted and he said I would never trust him again, does that mean he would consider it or is that a way of saying no, he told me after he left he no longer loved me and I should find someone I deserve, Im hurt and very confused. How do I start over?
Most Helpful Girl
Wow I am so sorry this has happened to you. :( This is never fun to read on GaG even from strangers. If there is any hope of you two working on your marriage again, then YES, the trust statement he laid out for you was a way for him to figure out your reaction to it. If you felt like you could work on your marriage and said you needed time to learn to trust again then it could have given him something to think about. You're over 45?--putting him somewhere at least 64? He absolutely sounds like he is NOT dealing with growing older very well and made a rotten mistake.
If you have ever read my responses before you'll know I'm a believer in second chances and trying to make things work if I think that one or both people really do want things to work and there is still real love there. You might want to ask yourself if you can live the rest of your years with what he's done and knowing that you are both going to start a new chapter of your marriage working things through, or can you imagine going the rest of your years without him, and starting the next chapter of your life on your own or give yourself time to find someone new.
I really wish you well, and if you decide you need time and space, he needs to know this too so that he has some indication whether or not your marriage still has a chance.0