Great chemistry, but nothing else seems to work?

I recently broke up with my off and on of 6 and a half years, and I'm devistated. Well, she broke up with me, for a fourth time. I don't understand how you can just have the most amazing chemistry with someone, but the two of you just keep hurting each other. It's so ridiculous to me!! What the hell? The communication is great, we have everything in common, we never shit up around each other and the sex is by far some of the best we've both had, and that's admitted by both sides. But, we've broken up a bunch of times, we've lied to one another, cheated on one another, and it just can't make it work. Eventually we parted on good terms and took it as a sign. I wish it wasn't true, but I just don't get it. Why does it have to be like this? She said " I love you more than anyone I've ever loved in my life. Nobody loves it gets me the way you do. You're my best friend and my love for you will never change, but I'm going to take this as a sign and we should just move on." With all the great things we do have, how come this keeps going to hell? Bye the way we've both forgiven each other and there's no bad blood, that I know of. Ladies, can you give me some perspective? Why did she really leave? Is she protecting herself? Or does she feel guilty about what she's done on her end? She said the damage is irreparable, but I'm of the opinion that you don't give up unless you want to. Maybe I'm just being crazy right now.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm thinking love and chemistry just isn't enough. It's not enough to just have chemistry. You need to be compatible and you're not

    • Maybe that's it. When I was thinking about it yesterday, we're very different people. Also, she's never happy with her life in general. She has a hard time finding work, lives with her parents, and doesn't have many friends. My life is pretty much the opposite of that and I've always tried to help her see how talented and amazing she is, but it never sinks in. My sign is that she's incomplete, and needs to succeed at something on her own. You can't be in a relationship when you're not happy with yourself.

    • Exactly. I'm learning that the hard way. But I completely agree, until you're happy and feel complete with just yourself, it can't possibly work if there's someone else in your life too

Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • "With all the great things we do have, how come this keeps going to hell?"

    Probably because of the "we've lied to one another, cheated on one another, and it just can't make it work".

    "I'm of the opinion that you don't give up unless you want to". <<< true. accept it.

    • Well that was to the point.

    • Then my level if forgiveness in people have been lowered. I've forgiven her at every turn, and I don't get the same back. Apparently we weren't on the same page.

What Guys Said 2

  • I'm Going To Give You My Professional Unlicensed Opinion, She Left You Because Even Tho You Guys Always Get Back Together Maybe She Was Fed Up This Time & Really Wanted To Move On. She Is Protecting Herself From Getting Hurt Again, She Might Fear It Will Happen Again. Apparently Both Of You Guys Have Did Your Dirt In The Relationship, Just Move On, It's For The Best...

    • She left me three times before and up until the last year, I played it completely straight with her. She did the majority of the damage, though I will defiantly own my actions. But to imply that everything good we have holds no merit, and my level of forgiveness I've handed her after dumping me three times and cheating on me, is just profound. If anyone should be protecting themselves, it's me.

  • Many people are broken and will sabotage a relationship because they think it's too good. It's not a good thing, but it happens. Sounds like this might be her, the relationship scares her because it's intense so she lies, cheats and tries to drive you away.

    If, after 6 1/2 years you can't figure out how to be together you should probably move on.


Recommended myTakes