Is it ok if I want to break up with my baby mama?

my question is this i have a baby with my current girl friend, before she got pregnant or before we knew she was i felt like i lost that spark or interest she not the person she represented at the beginning, i respect her and im trying to help her out i work while she finishes school all she has to do is baby school and help around the house, she doesn't do anything around the house i come from work she's she says she didn't have time then i asked what she did all day she said nothing baby. im like what?
so again question is should i break up or should i just keep quite and not be happy for the sake of my son?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well here's what you need to first ask yourself, is do you feel like she is respecting you? I mean your working to support your guys child the least she could do is make sure you have a clean home and your baby is in a safe & clean house, secondly do you love her or are you still there as it is purely for your son?
    Third, If you do leave her are you still going to help out money wise so that your child has, food, clothes, diapers/pull ups, or anything else he may need, fourthly, will she have a place to go where she can keep raising your child safely? Fifth are you going to to be aloud to see your son or will she be so upset over you leaving you will have to get court rights too see him and lastly are you really going to be happy in the end if you leave her? yes the house is messy, she could do more but raising a baby and going to school is much the same as having a full time job, only the pay is just in the joy of getting your Education to make a better life for your child and watching your baby be happy, healthy & learning

    • Ok one of the things that you mention is if she's has some where to go and that's a no that's why I'm also keep calm and not making any decisions but is not like she's doing it all solo like I said I'm splitting the responsibility or I might me even taking more I'm studying and working and also having to come home and clean and also do my share with the baby

    • Maybe try having a small chore list of what you'd like to have done before you get done that she can do while the baby is napping, such as get laundry going in the wash, do a load of dishes tidy the living room and kitchen I mean all in all that takes about 30-45 minutes, and she could easily do that while the baby is sleeping, or maybe you should have a sit down talk and tell her how you feel and that you would appreciate if she would do a few things around the house so you won't have to worry about it when you get home

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What Girls Said 4

  • try talking to her and coming to solutions before ending it. there's a child involved. no need to add to statistics without at least trying to work on ur relationship

    • i have talk to her plenty of times she works at something the she just ok it snot important anymore
      for eg. i took her to dmv got her the book to get he dl she studies the book today and in 2 days i ask her have u study she says yes then i ask can i see the book she says wait let me look for it she doesn't find it cus i know where is at

    • im holding it im doing it for my son but i can't keep faking it if its not ther in the long run i feel like im going to lose my self

  • people breakup with they baby mamas and baby daddys all the time. Just expect to pay child support :)

    • i dont need to pay child support i take care of my son i love my son and if its up to that i would take her to court and fight for my son i do not regret my son also his name is nathan and i would do anything for him hell im doing it now im staying melo but u can stay melo for so long till u get crazy

    • Ohhh yeaaa. You have a point there. Yea I don't know what to tell you. I guess I was jus goin by my view of living with a single parent

    • its cool i found this page and though maybe a girl can enlighten me on some stuff but the facts as you can see is there there's no excuse its not like im not helping im dong everything possible so she can finish her studies at least to have a career the least she can do is show me some effort but thats for hearing me out

  • I imagine it won't last forever. Just until she gets her life back to normal she'll act better. :)

    • Well I hope but it's been 5 month since she gave birth it sound like I'm whining but

    • And she's still acting that way. Then your not being whiney she is. If she doesn't learn to live on her own than you might as well end it cause you deserve better. :)

  • Because babies take up so much time, maybe she's doing all that and sometimes just doesn't get round to washing dishes or hoovering or dusting.
    A newborn is mad hard work. I've seen friends do it, and they're just always tired, even when they take off a long time off of work for maternity leave.
    When they start toddling around, it's even worse. I was literally just speaking to my friend about all this today, because her man is complaining of the same thing, so I had to tell him and break it down for him, like the baby needs x amount of feeds a day, those bottles need to be washed in between, however many nappy changes, stimulating the baby mentally and spending time speaking, singing and playing with the baby... and that stuff is just in the early days, it gets much busier.

    • but mama i help around the house we split it even if i could i would brest feed him but there's the next best thing is the pump and i give him bottles i work study and also do stuff around the house im not asking for much but show interest show u want to progress is not she's stuck and then when i get mad she give me the sad puppy face like i a bad guy and i can't

    • Oh ok, I thought she did it all alone, while you work. I guess she could make more effort then.
      I personally don't think you should break up so fast, because sometimes having a baby changes things, and not necessarily for the better, but once the couple get over that initial hump, they do better... But then even that... You were still feeling different about her before the baby came along. All I'm saying, it's your babymama now, don't make any hasty decisions you might regret later on. If you decide in a year that you'd really like a proper family unit, and she's moved on by then, what you gonna do?
      Nobody can say break up with her or not, nobody is there seeing all the little things you guys do.

    • I like that last one it makes you think.

What Guys Said 1

  • As long as you pay child support and visit weekly to spend bonding time with your daughter, then it seems fine to me.

    • its a boy my son

    • Oh yeah my bad, I don't know why I said daughter lol. But yeah, my uncle faced a similar situation. He divorced his wife with who he had 3 kids with. He pays child support and visits them on the weekends. Everything worked out in the end. The kids adapted to the situation pretty fast.

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