Really need advice. Very sad. Sorry that it's long but I have nobody to talk to?

Hi everyone I really need sound advice from you guys & girls. My ex broke up w/me a few months ago after I found out about him cheating. He hopped into another relationship shortly after our breakup.

I don't want to sound dumb, but I'm hurting so bad. We were together for 3 years & I truly loved him but its obvious that I meant nothing to him. For the most part I'm ok but every so often I have a "moment."

I went no contact immediately. He tried to contact me & start an argument but I ignored him. He talked about how serious he is w/his new gf, how they been together for 5 months and all that shit. I acted like I didn't care but inside I'm hurting bad.

Why would he contact me after 6 months to be hateful? He wanted the breakup so why did he try to rub it in my face?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Evidently he's an asshole. A hurt asshole, I'll give him that. For some reason at point of your relationship (not 6 months ago, but actually way before that) something change within him, something about what he feels for you or about you and suddenly he cheats, then kicks you, then finds another girl, and then tries to hurt you. I'd say the guy's an ass all the way... and I get it, it's painful to realize it, and to know this guy is just out there to hurt you.

    You did nothing wrong. Move on... hard, I know but all you can do. This guy is not ready to have a polite conversation even if you would be interested in that. I know it's tempting to try to understand what the fuck is wrong with him but right now the best answer might just be he's an asshole you know...

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • The fact that he's trying to hurt you proves one thing; you "won".
    He's not over it at all, and blames you (for some, that's a way of handling tought situations). So to make himself feel better he tries to make you feel down, make it seem like you're the one who got the shortest straw.

    As for how to deal with it, i can't really help you, i'm sorry :/

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  • Keep doing what you're doing.

    He broke up, so if he wanted any closure, he should've been the one to do that when he broke up.

    If anyone wanted/deserved a closure conversation it was you. But I think you're doing the right thing. He is the past, quit thinking about him and move on to your future.

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  • I had similar thing. My ex kept sayin I had too move on. At the Tim everything she did hurt but lookin back now, I find myself thinkin why? I'm happy now. Yes my ex was fit as and prob better looking than my Mrs now but my Mrs now is so much better in everyway n looks are not everything

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What Girls Said 2

  • 1. He's not over it. As much as a jerk he's acting, he doesn't know how to communicate that.
    2. He's a sack of crap

    Be honest with him. Tell him how you feel and you don't tolerate disrespect. Let him know if he wants to have a conversation for closure than so be it. But sweetheart the last thing you need for a boy to boast about a rebound. Everybody knows the girl after a long break up is a rebound. Lastly wish them well. Kill with kindness.

    Good luck love !!

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  • First off, it's not dumb at all! :) for whatever reason people just get into relationships for the sake of it which isn't fair on the other person who is in it for real reasons. For him to do that for three years is a nono! He is texting you these things now to make you jealous and to provoke a response and the only reason I can think of for him to do this is that there wasn't many outbursts of emotion in your relationship. That sounds mad but my sister did this same thing to her lad and I asked her why. She said that the guy was fine for a while and then just went totally 2 dimensional - they had a laugh but there was no 'raging' , arguing, that kinda stuff. She said that because of that there was no uncertainty, no feeling of excitement. The perfect relationship is always imperfect.

    I'm not sure how much this helps but it's usually good to hear stories from others in that situation :)

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