Why am I being ignored after she dumped me?

I was dating this girl on and off for a few years. When I first met her things were perfect. Three months into it she let me know that she's still not over her ex husband and didn't think she ever would be. Said she'd understand if I just walked away now. I decided to try and I ended up falling in love with her. She did not fall in love with me in return. Because of this she ended the relationship the first time. Eventually we got back together and tried again but as time went on the less she tried. I did everything I could to be an amazing guy to her. I wanted to win her heart. But I was the only one who truly cared.

I'd ask questions about how she feels and she ended up getting sick of me talking about "us" and would ignore me for weeks if I brought it up. So basically I could continue to hang out with her but I was in limbo about what we actually were. Terrible situation for me because I was confused a lot. And nothing I did was good enough anymore. She turned the blame on me saying that I changed and I'm not the same person she first met.. when the whole time I've just loved her and wanted to be with her.

I recently got back from deployment and we started hanging out again. I hung out with her for a few days, got a kiss and everything. Then, after a night out I went to kiss her as I was dropping her off at her house and she pulled away. I had just kissed her the other day, so I was confused why it wasn't okay this night. When I questioned it she got mad and said she just didn't want to talk about this again. Then she told me to just leave and to never contact her again. I tried to calm her down, just wanted to talk as mature adults but she wasn't having it and just turned her back to me and walked inside. I tried to give her time but after a few days I sent her a message which she read. A week later I sent her another wishing to be friends but she didn't even read it. Why is she ignoring me? Makes me feel like she hates me. I'm so down. What happened?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Aw. :( . First thank you for your service.

    This was doomed from the beginning unfortunately, I know harsh to hear. When a lady says she's not over someone. She's not and it's going take time, but you both forced yourselves. Which wasn't wise at all. The worst feeling is to totally love someone and that person doesn't love you back. You can't win someone's heart. You show them you care and they have to be willing to take yours and reciprocate that back.

    Now the rest is just messed up. I understand all you want her is to 100% real, straight up, honest. That's hard for some girls who hasn't given you their heart. But for the sake of the relationship I feel that that's pretty selfish of her leaving you high and dry like that.

    Lastly, you did EVERYTHING you could, from what you explained, so you shouldn't feel down. Know your worth!! I say all of this to say, who knows what she was thinking!! You texted her, called her, took her out etc. Try to move on and ask for some closure. If she doesn't want that that's another confirmation that she's not that right girl for you!!

    Good luck !!


Most Helpful Guy

  • You broke up in the first place, that's what happened.
    You don't simply forget someone after a breakup, and it's not uncomon to feel a certain conection to someone you love, nor is it uncomon to act not rational after a breakup.
    My guess is that something made her realize what she was doing, and that it was best to leave in order to avoid doing something REALLY stupid.

    Also, why do you keep trying and trying? I know love can be great, but to me it seems clear you two will never make it work. Why keep chasing her when it's going to cost you so much to gain so little?


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What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe she wants to feel something because you've tried so hard but she just doesn't feel anything back. That would explain her irrational outbursts of anger and confusing behavior. You sound really sewwt, so you should look for someone worth your time :)

  • She doesn't really sound worth your time. Congrats on dodging a bullet. Now next time when she crawls back, which she will, tell her to fuck off.


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