Should I bring flowers on a date with my ex?

So, she agreed to give us another try, but we're taking it slow. We met up once and there were good vibes generally, and I kissed her at the end. she seemed to enjoy it, and didn't reject the kiss at all. however, a day later when we spoke on the phone and she said if we're giving it another shot, the basis for a strong relationship is friendship, so for the time being no kissing, or anything overly "relationship-like", we just need to enjoy each other's company to begin with.
BUT, she's a born and bred romantic (the type that watches lots of Pride and Prejudice) and she kind of wants me to be bold and direct at the same time (I gather), she also deeply loves flowers.
So on this next date I have coming up with her I had the idea of going to the florist and getting her a few yellow roses (good sentiment, but not too lovey like red roses) and going to this romantic spot and hiding them. I'll then meet up with her, bring her to a nice lunch spot, talk to her yadda yadda, then walk her to this nearby romantic spot (big view of the city) and reveal the hidden flowers. I will tell her that I still understand that she wants us to enjoy each other's company but I wanted to buy the flowers as a sweet gesture. I know that she really appreciates a man who makes an effort for her, and I want to demonstrate that (I sort of stopped doing that in our past relationship), nothing more nothing less for now. I want to give her a preview of what the potential new relationship will be like.

She also mentioned on the phone that she was watching the bachelor, and I said jokingly that it's lame :P and she said, well I reckon you should watch it, it's a pretty good indication of what i want a relationship to be like.



Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, honestly I'd say go out with her again before you bring flowers into the picture. Give her a chance to realize that you understood and respect everything she said about avoiding anything "overly relationship-like." I understand where you're coming from about wanting to appease her and her romantic side; however in this type of situation it's very important to play it safe and try to stick by what you're almost positive the other person is comfortable with. If she wants to take it slow, don't allow anything to challenge that too early in the game. So, all in all, I definitely wouldn't give up the idea entirely – I would just wait it out until another outing in the near future.

    • So you'd say wait till say the 3rd or 4th outing?

    • ALSO when i text her every couple of days, she's more than happy to talk, but she doesn't really initiate txting. though she rarely did in the relationship anyway... im sort of worried she's not really thinking about me, ya know? just dont want her to move on. should i worry about this?

    • Yeah, I don't think it would hurt to give it a little bit of time. Why take the risk until you're getting a good vibe from her that she's ready for it, you know? And your concern about the texting... well, if she didn't initiate when you guys were previously together, I don't think it's a red flag or indicator of anything bad/serious (especially since she's happy to talk when you guys text, regardless of who initiated). I only think you should worry if she shows more blatant signs that she's not thinking about you... texting seems like such a minor aspect to break apart, you'll only grow paranoid thinking about it too much. Enjoy speaking to her!

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  • If you feel like doing it, it's wonderful. It's not coming to strong.


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