So my ex boyfriend and I dated for 6 months. the last month, he started acting kind of strange. He would act silent and kind of distant. I thought him and his friends were talking badly about me to one another. and I looked to one of my friends for assistance.
My friend advised me to dump him and said he wasn't worth it and all these things, and I believed him. I kind of told a few of my friends that I was going to do it a week prior.
Turns out, my friend who helped me just took advantage of the situation and hoped to get with me once I dumped my boyfriend. I had to reject him twice, and he still goes for it and tells me that my ex still isn't worth thinking about. He'll get defensive and angry. He lied to me to get me to dump my ex.
And it turns out that my ex never talked badly about me and if anyone ever tried, he would shut them up and tell them to stop. I still don't know what his problem was then, I would ask but he would be silent. I know he has depression and some other things going on, but I thought too much about myself and not about him.
I feel terrible because I love him but I was too nervous he was going to break up with me, so I looked to outside sources for help and I was dumb enough to believe some homewrecker into breaking up with my ex. The worst part about it is neither of us really got closure because I didn't know what to say. We weren't ready to break up. but i made a mistake.
Now my ex is with another girl as a rebound (they got together within 2 weeks) and I can't decide whether to wait it out and have a serious discussion with him or not, whether we end up getting back together or just getting closure.
We still kind of text and snapchat and are friendly but I stay low just to give him and his new girl a chance.
Did I ruin it?
Most Helpful Guy
Well yes you did. I understand getting advice for someone but you have to have your own mind and not be manipulated into turning a thought you had into something that wasn't. You should first point blank asked your now ex if he was taking about you. Also you should have asked more friends to get a general idea, especially other females.
I think your doing the right things keeping your distance while he is with someone and being respectful. If it really is just a rebound he won't last long and you will be able clear the air and see what happens next.0
Most Helpful Girl
Many times over, just because it's 'Over,' doesn't mean both parties, because they Break up, Can't Make up and end up in one another's lives once again. And with the Fairly 'Friendly' factor of chit chat and checking in, many times it leads to a friends with benefits factor too.
However, in your case, with the Newbie 'Rebound' Rebecca he found in Hosh Kosh, it hasn't gotten this far---Thus far. But one never knows, given some time, that he might just come back and cry on your shoulder because something wouldn't be right in Denmark... And with this being said, it could 'End up' in Bed.
If you think you may have a shot, keep it lite and semi sweet with just Civil. But don't fold or fall for Anything Else as long as he is hooked at the hip with her. It's not the 'Closure' you would be looking for, should you become involved in what I call a 'Triangle threesome,' where you are at the top, looking down, from side to side at the cozy couple at hand right now.
And if you find you are tired of 'laying low,' later on in time, then move on, start over, and Consider That the Answer to close the chapter of this fairytale that just wasn't meant to be.
Good luck. xx0