My boyfriend cheated and I don't know what to do?

I just found out that 6 months ago, my boyfriend had sex with one of my good friends. He kept it a secret he said because he didn't want to lose me. We had been together for almost 2 years and I broke up with him. I was so hurt. He wants me back and I don't know if I should move on or give him a second chance. He lied through his teeth to me for 6 months, but he was awesome. But he never did anything fun with me or take me on dates often. He shot me down for going to the zoo, prom, museum, picnics, etc. If it wasn't what he wanted he got mad.
  • you did the right thing
    Vote A
  • you didn't do the right thing
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Guy

  • I accidentally voted B when I meant to vote A.

    You absolutely did the right thing. Cheating is bad enough on it's own, but to purposefully hide it and conceal it makes it that much worse.

    Just out of curiosity, how did you find out?

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • He made the mistake of telling my best guy friend. Who told me. So I confronted him and he confessed

    • Ah, okay.

      Yeah I think you did the right thing. Trust has been demolished not only by his cheating (that'd be enough for me to completely drop someone on its own) but also by his LONG concealment of it.

      You'll find someone better when you're ready.

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What Guys Said 7

  • "he never did anything fun with me or take me on dates often. He shot me down for going to the zoo, prom, museum, picnics, etc. If it wasn't what he wanted he got mad."

    Before your question can reasonably answered, where did you see awesome in this? I mean, in the first place?

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    • He was the greatest. up until 6 months ago, which was when he cheated on me. He was always sweet and kind to me and was there for me to talk to

    • Show All
    • He was a perfect boyfriend before. Even if he didn't like it he would go with me. After the cheating thing, he pushed me away and acted like a dick. I could have been turning a blind eye since I love him. But it's also possible that he changed his behaviors. He said he changed his behavior because he felt bad. But I don't know

    • sounds like you'll do well to move on

  • If he didn't want to spend time with you (zoo, museum, picnics, and ESPECIALLY prom), then you obviously did the right thing... and the fact that he cheated on you and lied about it for six months, its obvious you did the right thing to that jerk of a guy...

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  • I mean it's up to you but I would bite the bullet and move on.

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  • forgive him please

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  • Guy's a grade "A" dipshit. Good for you!

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  • He should of taken you both out on the days of fun and had sex with you both sex is just sex really

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    • US both?

    • Yes you both

    • Like me and him or both of us girls he was seeing

What Girls Said 6

  • Leave him and don't go back to him, I made a stupid mistake of going back to my ex who had cheated on me when I should've walked away but I was dumb and stupid and didn't listen to my gut. But I've healed now and I are no longer together whatsoever. You did the right thing, if he begs you to come back to him, don't do it. He probably really didn't love you maybe he just loved the "benefits" of having you or being with you. Trust me I've been there done that, it was a slap right in the face for me. You need to listen to your heart and move on never go back to a cheater because if they cheat on you once they will do it again. They're are plenty of fish in the sea for everyone you just have to out there and meet them. My ex was something like that he was good as making me feel special etc. But he never took me out on dates, never made time for me, and never even met my family as well. Took me a while to realize he didn't deserve me after all, you deserve better you don't deserve a cheater. If he wants to cheat on you then he can stay single. You just move on with your life and go out and meet other young men, and you will find your perfect match.

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  • Move on. If he repeatedly lied to you for six months, he would repeatedly lie to keep you. Sounds as if he is/was a controller, you would always find yourself comromising your principals with someone like that.
    I'm so sad for you, no one deserves to be treated like you have been, you did the right thing breaking iT off with him.

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  • I think you did the right thing. I think if you cheat and tell your partner straight away, you may be able to salvage a relationship. But the fact that he lied and hid it for 6 months means you will likely never be able to trust him again.

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  • no cheater deserves a second chance in my opinion. cheating is a choice, not a mistake. don't ever take him back. move on and try to find a guy that's not a complete asshole

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  • Well of course he doesn't want to lose you because he is a controlling jerk and you allowed him to treat you like a doormat. Do you know what happens to doormats? They get dirt and mud slung all over them. Once in a blue moon they may get dusted off but not often enough. Such as what this guy is doing. He knows you will end up doing whatever HE wants to do and he likes that. Cause if he didn't he would tell you about it and blame it on you. You are teaching him how to treat you and sadly even now you are teaching him that you don't deserve an ounce of respect.
    Lose his number, tell him to lose yours, and move on. That's exactly what you should do.

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  • Easy... dont be sad about losing a man that obviously isn't into you enough! No second chance.

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