My ex girlfriend drunk text/calls me and she calls me every morning on her way to and from work?

My ex and I were in a relationship for 3 years, she just got divorced the year before and she left me in January this year saying she still has feelings for her ex. She keeps meeting me on the weekends as I am her cinema friend? And I don't see it as anything more, recently she has been calling and texting whenever she is drunk and initiating conversations with me, yet when we meet up she says that she wants me to move on. She's 30 and my 28th bday is soon, I have asked her to spend the day with me on my bday as just friends but I am still in love with her. I'm very sure she knows that. I just don't know what to do anymore?
So what should I do?
Thank you all, I think I should try to distance myself from her and hit the gym lol, at least if I don't get her back then I'm going to be in great physical shape, but seriously thank you all for your help


Most Helpful Guy

  • When she is inebriated, since she has a somewhat close relationship with you, you are the first and perhaps the only person she reaches out to. Why is this? I assume she finds the regular interactions with you welcomed and enjoyable, which is a break from the normal stress she endures.

    Thus, she naturally reaches out to you when she drinks and reflects on her situation, to feel better. Interacting with you influences her to feel better. So, why the nickname calling? She calls you by the nickname she chose for you to make you feel better about conversing with her. It's familiar to her, thus she repeats it.

    Then, once she is sober, it's a different story. Gone are the nickname calling. Gone are the mixed signals.

    • So you think its more of a comfort thing, rather than her having feelings for me and being confused about "us"?

    • Show All
    • Ok, she does say that she still cares for me and she has said that she doesn't want to know her ex anymore, as she tried to work things out with him and it hasn't worked out. So I really am confused. She has actually been texting me today and has been quite flirtatious not calling me by my nickname, this has added more to the confusion

    • There you go again. Do not be quick and eager to assume that there is a motive behind her flirty behavior today, since it's not consistent and she fails to flirt with you in person. I mean, she could be having a good day and, as such, in a good mood. The reasons could be many. Or, she could be hinting at being something more. Although I have my doubts about that. My point, if she is telling you to move on, the chances of her hinting at wanting something more are extremely, extremely slim.

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  • She has to decide if she wants to be with you or not - and that could be a relationship or FWBs.

    Drinking might be how she's coping with this stress in her life, this isn't your problem and it isn't really fair either to be leading you on like this and giving you false hope. You're hovering on the cusp of the friendzone.

    • Any advice on how to get her to choose which she wants?

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    • I think I will try the dating thing, see what happens

    • Drunk texts don't really bother me, its just the whole her being both flirtatious over the texts and calls (drunk) and completely different otherwise

  • Standard ex problems: They want you in there lives but as a friend, they want you to meet someone else and still hangout with them..

    • But then why give me drunk texts/calls and call me by the nickname she gave me and flirt with me (only when drunk)?

    • Because she doesn't want you to move on although she doesn't want to be with you. It's hard to understand and there is no logic behind it.. but it's the truth

  • She was honest when she left you and said exactly why. I'm sure she would like to be just friends with you and that's great but you still love her and go out with her and that is probably painful for you. If you don't mind staying in that situation then keep it going and maybe you'll have your change in a near future. If you don't want to stay in that situation just be honest to her like she was to you and tell her that you still love her and to go out with her without being loved back is painful for you and you rather stop going out with her.

    • It took her 3 months to actually tell me the reason, she broke up with me, telling me that she is too stressed to be in a relationship at the moment. I then found out after asking her again that the reason was her having feelings for her ex, who now she doesn't want to know? And now she's texting me when she's drunk calling by my nickname she gave me onl y when drunk, I honestly don't know if she wants to be with me or not, as when she's drunk she's always calling me by my nickname and trying to have conversations with me, yet when she's not drunk she's not really messaging me

    • Do you think she has feelings for you now? Maybe she text u when she's drunk because she feels guilt for breaking with you. Are the texts flirty?
      Maybe she's confused, just ask her why she texts you when she's drunk.

    • If I try to ask her "whats up with these drunk texts?" She just says "oh, I won't message you again" ? Does seem a little like she has feelings for me but it seems like she's scared of saying it or something, bloody confusing!!!

  • She's stringing you along.


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