How to gently let break up with my girlfriend?

I know I'm a bad person for dating her in the first place, but the spark is gone and even though I have some strong feelings for her, I feel that I must let her go. I know the whole affair is going to be heart breaking, but how to make it less so? How do you tell a sweet girl that she's not what you are looking for? please help before this goes any further.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • There's no way that it will not hurt her so just know that she will feel pain and that it's not possible to avoid that. But also keep in mind that you're doing the right thing and that in the long run she'll be very happy that you told her and didn't keep it up for longer. The less time she lives in her illusion that you two are happy, the better. Just call her up, meet her in person and then tell her the truth. It will be tough. It will be one of the most difficult things you've done but just know that it's normal to lose feelings and that it's not your fault. If she has anything to say, listen. If she gets angry, then accept it and don't just walk away. Try to talk to her and offer her your friendship. Lastly do not completely abandon her after the break up... oh gosh it's awful to break up with someone and for them to just walk away and never hear from them again. My last ex dumped me in a very painful manner and when I simply asked him a question over text he blocked me from whatsapp. I just asked him if he wanted pictures that were taken on a night out... it really tore me apart that someone that meant so much could be so cold. So please... just be nice to her afterwards and after a week or so just check in and ask her if she's still OK. It's just comforting to know that someone you just spent the last x amount of months or years with still cares about you.

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    • Thanks for the feedback, I hope she won't think that I'm an animal after this.

    • She won't. She'd only think that if you lead her on for years, pretending you wanted her when you really didn't... or cheating. Which isn't the case for you. So don't feel bad. It's normal and it happens. I've been on the dumped side and done the dumping too. It hurts but that's the risk you took when you entered the relationship.

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What Girls Said 3

  • why is she not what you're looking for? you have strong Feelings for her, but she is not what you're looking for? not possible

    just tell her, that's it. the sooner, the better for her

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    • It actually is, thing is, there's a part of me that really likes her, but i think it was a mistake getting into a relationship in the first place, and that nagging thought just won't let me be. So much so that I am expending a lot of energy when she's around to act like everything is alright, while its not. What I'm saying is that she's great! I like her, but there's that one thing missing and its absence kills the whole dynamic. Thanks for the feedback though.

    • just go with the flow? do you know what that Thing is?
      I don't really Thing that exists, but Hollywood etc. lead us to believe that "it" exits

  • Just be honest, don't beat around the bush, don't give her false hope. Be honest it will help her get over you

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  • Be honest and yet tactful about it
    Please dont disappear on her

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What Guys Said 2

  • Be honest and up front. It is gonna hurt but the sooner you do it the better

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  • You wanted to break up because she ismt always there for you?

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