we broke up at the start of the school year, i went 4 hours away for college and had to break up with him. I've never really liked anything before, kind of a sociopath really but with him it was different i LOVED him. we met when i was 15, and we dated for awhile, i literally fell for him- everything about him. he wasn't traditional hot but he was exptional in my eyes. and then one day he left me for another girl. he simply broke up with me 6 months later to have sex with some other girl, it was fucked up and really hurt me but I still loved him and when he was done with her and I still wanted him back, so then when I was 17 I was able to build up the curage to try and rekindle the flame. we clicked and stayed together and it was the craziest most passionate year of my life with him. I found out later on he spent the whole time cheating on me, and he never really did treat me right; always picking friends first, getting mad at me for going out into public. jsut weird stuff, but i LOVED him. i can't explain it, he just felt right and i was so comfortable with him, but at the same time he absolutely destroyed everything about myself, my self-esteem, my body image, my perception on what love is. and i still want him- no one seems good enough for me BUT him. why am i so fucked up, so stuck in this abusive love cycle with him, and how do i move on and realize i deserve better. because i know i do.
How to move on from your first love?
What Guys Said 2
there are many steps to take, but the first one is always to admit your better then that and deserve better than that sort of treatment. The rest really are all up to you and how you wish to live you life. In the shadows until you have the courage to stand in the light alone facing the waves of life and dread. Or fly high in the skies with not a care in the world and the ground with other people beneath you to look up and hold awe to your majesty.1
There's no real easy solution here. The only thing that will solve things is breaking off all contact and letting time heal things. I know it's hard but you have to pick yourself up and move on. You're very attractive, finding someone else won't be a problem.1
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