I have been diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety and PTSD. It all started with my awful relationship with my ex boyfriend. He was controlling, manipulative and a drug abuser. During the course of our relationship he abused me in every way. The day I left him is something I will never forget. he accused me of cheating on him but I didn't. So he didn't believe me and went to the garage. He grabbed the black bottle of petrol and he had matches in his mouth. He poured petrol over me, he poured petrol on himself and all over the lounge room. He's started screaming "this will be the last day alive I'm going to kill us all!! You better start praying to God" I started to pray he's like "God will not save you he can't change this situation right now!" I'm literally crying and begging him dont light the fucking match you idiot I hate you how the fuck could you do this to me?"
In that moment I said to myself "I'm going to die in a few seconds" The only way I could stop him was to smash the bottle of alcohol and run for my life. I never thought anything so extreme and traumatic could affect me in such a way. I'm having nightmares. I keep thinking he's near me and watching me. It's been a couple months and I can't move on from the event. I've been to therapists/psychologists and I'm not getting the tools to help me move on. Thier treatments work but the demons keep coming back to me and I have to start all over again. I'm going in circles and I pretty much know I'll be alone for a long time. how can I move on?
(I'm sorry if the post is long) please don't write mean comments its a lot for me post this here :(
Most Helpful Guy
All things in the physical abode can heal' the nightmares are only as real as the memorie in event' meaning in your thinking you return to that event and or reality so it will always be there. Those demons are as strong as the power of your brain process. If possible create a love story in mind to replace the other story' I know it seems tuff now but later in time the images will fade out... EASIER SAID THEN DONE RIGHT... NO!!! IT WILL BE MADE EASY (replace with a perfect relationship story of images) THEN IT WILL BE DONE!!! Also knowing he has gotten arrested and can't hurt you should also help?' Please remember all images fade in time it's the power of thought that keeps it alive... watch (IMAGE +ANIMATION=IMAGINATION) see? images come from the memorie located in the occipital lobe where eyesight is located+ animation comes from the diaphragm where feelings and or emotions dwell. You always had the power to control or destroy the memorie in realism it means to you but it would take quite some time to know and or try this excersize' when your ready that is... I hope this reaches your enthusiasm. Thankyou for posting this mature kind of topic 'may all be well with you.0