Do I walk or stay and what does "I need space" mean?

Me and my gf broke up after 7 years, around 2 months ago. She told me she wasn't in love with me anymore and the spark had gone for her. We left it for about a month and then she came back telling me she's been missing me and wants to see how things go and so we did, First they were going great and after a week i decided to sask what we actually were. This pushed her away and she told me she had been forcing it and her feelings haven't really changed still. We tried for another week and during this time she would tell me one thing like she really believes were meant to be but after a couple days she would then take it back and doubt our relationship again. I finally couldn't take it no more so i told her to make a decision and either be all in and try or were done for good. She chose to leave. we've spoken a few times since and every time she keeps saying she just needs space and who knows what could happen, Things like distance can make the heart grow founder.. I know she has a lot going on in her life right now and i tried to show her that i could help but she said she doesn't want to bring me into her troubles and needs to figure things out by herself. She also said we shouldn't talk but she messaged me 1st the other day and we ended up talking all day even after that and saying we shouldn't have talked she again text me very briefly the next day.. Im just so confused and don't understand whats going on or what i should be doing anymore?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Needing space means they need distance from you, to gather their thoughts, so they can decide if they want be in the relationship or not, the best thing to do as she's having space, is use the opportunity to have your space
    To meditate on the relationship too, dont use that time mopeing about and wondering, take advantage of that time for yourself, good luck

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    • I just don't understand it because she clearly thought about this and missed me when she decided to come back the 1st time.. It all the sudden feels like I'm no longer good enough and 7 years doesn't mean a lot to her "/.. I have been working on myself and just joined the gym and I'm trying to be out and stay as active as i can, Its just so hard because you miss that person so much its all your can think about and want to talk about.

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    • Making her jealous won't bring her back to you, it will push her further away, not avgood game to play,

    • Thats what i was trying to say, I don't want to play that game.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Ok bro this is what you do exactly. You will have to play the laid back role and let her do the majority of the chasing at this point. Just continue being yourself and be kool with her when you see/talk to her but don't be aggressive with her. It sounds like she doesn't know what she wants right now and if you push she will push back. Just focus on yourself and think of her as a friend right now. When she figures that you won't chase her she will start thinking that you may find/found someone else and thats what will make her more interested in making things more official rather than wishy-washy

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    • I thought about doing this, Just completely deactivating my Facebook and Twitter and any other social means i have with her for awhile, That way she has no idea of what I'm doing at all..

    • you could but she could also see it as ur trying to get her attention by throwing it in her face that ur done. U don't even have to do that, just pretend that you have no feelings for her. Let her come around

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What Girls Said 1

  • What @citroenn... said... She needs to figure out what she wants

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