Feeling lonely sad after 5 months post-break up. Is this normal?

I was with my bf for 6 months long distance. He was the first guy I went out with after 5 years of not dating. When I first met him and even before we became friends I could see myself being married to him.

Our long distance relationship went downhill when I went backpacking for 3 months as we could only talk about 30 min at most each day and we weren't able to video chat because of wifi issues. We argued for 2 weeks straight and it became unbearable. Our issues were stuff that could have been solved but he just wanted to pretend everything was ok and not talk about things. I was the one who ended it thinking I had made the right choice.

He's blocked me on fb and I'm still blocked even after 5 months. I still miss him and I don't know if that means I made the wrong decision. I don't understand why he's still blocked me since he never blocks anyone and he's still friends on fb with exs who cheated on him. Since he never tried to talk to me again does that mean he doesn't care about me at all.

I wanted to Skype him after my trip and maybe sort things out but by then it was already 1 months after our break up and he had already blocked me.


Most Helpful Guy

  • No. It doesn't necessarily mean that.

    I removed my ex-wife from my Facebook when we separated. It wasn't because I hated her - au contraire - but because I was hurting, knew that we were both relatively heavy Facebook users, and I simultaneously wanted to protect my own feelings by removing her from free access to them, and also wanted to hurt her a little because I was hurting so much myself.

    The point of me telling you this is that I just went to check right now if I had also blocked her in addition to removing her, because I simply could not remember. At this point, while I am not entirely over her yet, I don't feel hostile towards her, and she wanted to keep in touch I probably would. So I would not want to go out of my way to block her. The point is that I had forgotten whether I did that or not. In the case of your ex, it may be something he did in the heat of the moment, and then it didn't cross his mind later on. Doesn't mean that _you_ didn't cross his mind, just that his Facebook settings didn't.

    I am sure if you wanted to, you could find some other way to send him a message. It would then be up to him to either get back to you or ignore you. As for still feeling bad after 5 months, of course it's normal. We take time to heal, and how long we need is different for each person and each relationship.

    I wish you healing & happiness.

    • Hi Unhyper, thanks for sharing your story. The thing that confused me is we weren't fb friends after breaking up. He uses fb a lot whereas I rarely use Facebook but only messaging app. That was our main way of communication and I was hurt and didn't want to be tempted to talk to him. Deactivating my account wasn't a choice as I still talked to my friends via fb messenger so I deleted him but sent him an email later to apologize and explain why I did it but he never replied. My profile is also private so he wouldn't have been able to see my status. But he blocked me a few weeks after we broke up when I asked for my stuff back. I have no other way to talk to him other than to email him but that's quite impersonal. I kind of want to coz I miss him but I also am afraid that he will not reply like when I previously emailed him asking how he is a few months back. A part of me feels like it was a mistake breaking it off, especially since we hadn't video messaged each other for a month..

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think that someone normal my suggestion would be to join a gym get out get some exercise start doing things that make you feel better about you and get ready to start dating again and enjoy the experience

    • I don't think a girl who goes backpacking for months needs to be recommended joining a gym. Just sayin'.

    • I am suggesting endorphins will help. Not a weight comment... working out is a positive way to ko g email on.. also it's around other people so you might meet some one? You just got to be around other people and get out of your head...

  • Yes, it's normal.


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