I broke up with my ex because she dressed like a slut. How am I the bad guy?

She was stupid enough to wear a dress which when light falls on it, is a see through. To make matters worse, that dumb bitch didn't wear a bra. I took her to an expensive place which had lighting. I was more fucking embarrassed than her. I had to leave cancelling my reservation I made days ago, and people were whistling and passing mean comments outside. the bitch deserved every bit of humiliation whereas I never deserved my day to go that way. I told her to take a taxi home, and she keeps calling me ever since. well now her friends have spread rumors around that I'm a bad jerk, where clearly I never did anything wrong. How am I bad?

Updates:
I'm done responding to feminists here. also, people who judge me for name calling, please remember her friends do the same in real life to me. and for the people who actually saw this in a general point of view. thank yyou

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What Girls Said 29

  • I believe that if you really respected her and Loved her, you could have handled things a bit differently. And with the 'see through,' it is even More See through to me that you both were most likely having toil and trouble in paradise way before this War of the Roses etched in stone With-----Reservations.
    You made your own bed when you Took her to this 'Expensive place.' You should have put your foot down and told her there was no way she was going Out in public to paint the town red embarrassed Red in this little number. And with this display, things got ugly and now she is calling you with a broken heart and you are reaching out for answers on GA, trying to shed some More light on the matter.
    Talk it out with her. If you both have any love and feeling left for each other, simply sit down and use open lines of communication with some compromise to solve this little dilly and the problems with the filly.
    Stop the boloney, stop the wagging tongues and kiss and make up and let's put this little sheer misunderstanding to bed.
    Good luck. xx

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    • Well her friends ruined it by spoiling my name around college. There's no way I'm getting back with her. at least you read the whole thing before commenting so thanks for your opinion

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    • This all new... it's not over, you will miss the kiss and be back with her.. xxoo

    • For now though I'm pretty happy being single.
      How come you didn't hate on me lol

  • You're an idiot. So she was showing off some skin. Have you NEVER gone outside shirtless? You've never been playing basketball with your buddies and went shirtless, or went swimming and were shirtless. You're always brainless, obviously. Who cares what she was wearing, if she's with you? She was dressing for you, obviously trying to turn you on. Or, and I know a LOT of women have done this, she wore it not realizing it was see-through. I've done it before, but I don't do it on purpose. If I like something, I'm gonna wear it, and if/when I realize it's see-through, yes, I'm embarrassed, but it's not something that I think about. I wear what I want. And who gives a fuck if a boob was visible? No bra? Wah. Cry me a river, build a bridge, then tie a cement block to your leg and jump off. Try to swim. You've obviously never worn shorts, never went shirtless, never wore a see-through tee shirt, or anything like that, because you're so perfect. Right? Why are men allowed to go out wearing whatever the hell they want, but women are supposed to cover themselves forehead to floor? Fuck men like you. If I want to go outside completely nude (which I'd never do that, too shy, not the point) I'll fucking do it. My boobs are just like yours: Only better to look at. If I have to be exposed to fat, ugly manboobs, you should have to deal with beautiful female boobs. Grow up, dude.

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    • that was beautiful, thank you. one who gets it ;-)

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    • Well, remember women used to cover up even their feet a long time back. you've made progress. if your wish is to see girls walk around topless like guys do, whether you like it or not, it will happen.

    • I didn't say I would want women to walk around topless. I'm saying I'd like it to be acceptable instead of frowned upon. I want women and men to be equal. Men to open doors for women, and women to open doors for men. Men to go topless, women to go topless. Men to cry, women to cry. Why do only women get special treatment like we're weak and useless, and men have to be like stone and never have emotion? Can't we all just be the same. Yea, you have a dick, I have boobs, but who gives a flying monkey? Physical differences are nothing more than physical. Why should men and women be socially acceptable to act/dress/talk in certain ways?

  • So you asked a girl who you know dresses provocatively out and yet you called her a slut. You keep referring to her as a "Bitch" and yet you keep telling us you're not a bad guy while in reality it makes you seem like a dickhead. You said she's your ex however it seems you guys went on one date?
    I doubt you ever had a girlfriend and I feel like this whole scenario is made up.

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    • 1. she's not on this site
      2. she's basically doing the same name calling to me, only in real life, where people's judgement actually matter
      3. if you think it's made up, great. there's no use of you replying to "made up" "scenarios"

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    • Well as you fail to see, I've told you probably in every one of my replies here to stop replying. so it's not really me who is either insulting you, or trying to prolong a very very pointless argument. I can say stop replying again, but seeing how adamant you are to insult me, go ahead.

    • lol k.

  • And did you even tell her why you were upset and why you're ignoring her now? I'm assuming no. Which kind of makes you the bitch here.

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  • I've worn stuff before that I didn't realize was see-through until a while later. Like you said, it was only when the light hit.

    The problem with you is that you never told her what the problem was. You chose to take the passive-aggressive route.

    P. S. There's actually a lot of guys that like it when they're girlfriend dresses sexy or shows skin.

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    • their*

    • I love it when my girlfriend dresses sext, it's just that you know I wasn't expecting that dress in that Place, well I overreacted I guess, I just got too mad. Thanks for putting across your point of view without hating

    • Sexy*

  • Did you at least tell her what you thought about what she was wearing? Because that's what adults do, instead of playing ridiculous games like this. If she cared about your opinion she likely would have changed her clothes. If she dresses like that all the time though, you probably should have never been with her in the first place if you have such a huge problem with it, like why would you have even wasted your time?

    Sounds like you don't respect her very much anyways, so you did the right thing by leaving her. Now she can go find someone better.

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    • MH for life!!

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    • My last comment was supposed to be to the ASKER!
      NOT the OPINION OWNER! this site is so confusing they could have just used our screen names

    • @Bitmap: No worries, I figured that out as I read the comment.

  • I don't know why everyone is upset you dumped her. Personally I'm very happy for her that she got away from you.

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  • You did the right thing, i don't like girls like that either, most like the one you mentioned are feminists, that would stick their horns out if you would hit her in self defense.

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    • There are a lot of feminazis around here. Thank you for seeing this issue in a general point of view. I'm sure you'd get downvoted for this but this is the answer I was looking for.

  • So what boo boo let her show what her Mama gave her. I would have shook my tits to get all the waiter to come at me

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    • I'm being serious, go away troll

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    • Well no1 told u to have a 60 years old gf. Her droopy tits is the shape of a tear drop, and will obviously get u to have tears in ur eyes and embarras u boo boo

    • Ok that made me laugh, but go away now

  • Unlike the rest , i agree with what you did. She clearly knew it was see through and shouldn't have put that on knowing you were taking her out. I understand she probably wanted to look nice for you but she shouldn't do it that way.

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  • No fucking way! Dude, how could she DARE do that to you? I'm disgusted on behalf of all women and I apologize, I'll spread the word and tell the rest of the females to stay well clear.

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    • Spread the word far and wide!

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    • Where's my cookies then? oh you punished me by not only teaching me a lesson, but also not giving me a cookie in the end. I get it :(

    • Well done grasshopper, your lesson is complete. Think before you speak and you may get a cookie.

  • Wellmif she was dressed that way when you met her and you thought she might change the way she dressed then that's on you. She is a human being with her own mind and can make her own decisions so if you didn't like that about her you have every right to make your own decisions as well and break up with her.

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  • What a jerk its all about how you felt. Selfish or what

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    • Do you people read my question at all?

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    • Miss rose, what you are doing is sticking up to a female.

    • No sticking up here. Only saying who was in the wrong. You obvs dont think u are anyway lol

  • I suppose you have the right to be upset, but you should've told her the reason why you were. She's not a mind reader.
    Friends will always protect friends, so of course they'll call you a jerk.
    Just like your friends will defend you by calling her a s1ut or b! tch.
    Either way I thought the reservation was pretty romantic of your part, just that she wore the wrong dress at the wrong event.

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  • I would of dumped her too! Fuck that a girl needs to look classy not slutty my man would probably be ashamed if I went out wearing short dresses that were see through! To me me a girl should either show cleavage or legs! Never both

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  • Well, she should have known better than to dress like a prostitute. I don't think you are a bad guy, but you should have at least said something like,"Baby, you seriously look amazing in that but I don't want every other male in the room to be eye raping you." You should have said something before you took her inside. If she wants to dress like a slut then you most likely shouldn't be with her if you want something serious. It doesn't seem like it was ever going to be serious if you break up over something that small.

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    • Well I overreacted maybe
      Thanks for your opinion nonetheless

    • @rissaboo26 eye raping! hahahaha thats fucked dude
      thats actually, probably the best way to handle this, coaxing her into doing what you want. then maybe pick a spot with worse, or VERY POOR lighting when you can handle it so she can wear that skirt out she bought, cuz, thats what girls do, they do their nails and go shoppin for a new skirt and when they're cleaning out their closet and they see the skirt that they never got to wear out on a date, or that she got yelled at for it being see through it makes em sad. and our jobs is to make girls happy, lets be honest here.

  • Wow. I wear short shorts and tank tops all the time and people I dress like a slut!! Ur ex was retarded who doesn't wear a bra and with a see through dress!! Gosh dang that's sad. And go on ahead and hate I don't care:P

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  • Haha she probably wanted to get your attention. But ended up turning you off.

    Girls try so hard to impress men. Try to explain to her how you felt. You were embarrassed. ( I would be to) lol

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  • You simply have standards. She's peobably exhibitionist.

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  • the real question is.. was she a slut? in and wasn't a slut then I think breaking up with her over how she dressed is a little much

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  • You're a misogynist and she deserves better

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    • Yah ok. I'd do the same thing. It disturbes me that you think what he did was bad. people who think like u would drop a man for the smallest thing but because she's a woman and ur a woman , u just take sides

    • I'm a lesbian, I wouldn't 'pick up' a man in the first place lmfao

  • Wow just wow

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  • You're obviously too immature to date. Women should be able to wear what they want. I don't dress like that because I don't feel comfortable, and I feel that at my age I shouldn't anyway. However I don't see anything wrong with other women who do. If they're happy and comfortable in their own skin than good for them. One of my guy friends has a girlfriend who dresses sexy all the time and he loves it. He's obviously secure in his relationship. You aren't. Maybe you should take a break from dating. You're probably one of those guys who controls everything his girlfriend does.

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    • Please, I've been through this same stuff before. If you have anything new to say please do, else there's no use reading the same thing over and over

    • I didn't read any of the other comments. There are way too many. I don't really care about anyone elses opinion but my own.

  • There is a saying the thing that normally attracts you to the person is normally the thing that makes you hate them aswell. Don't worry about it just think there more girls out there and I'm sure some other guy will like her

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  • First of all you sound like a complete asshole. You can't control what your partner wears. It's your girlfriend NOT your daughter.

    Secondly you knew she liked to "dress like a slut" it's completely your fault for dating her in the first place.

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  • i mean if you weren't comfortable with it I don't know why it would make you the bad guy. you don't HAVE to be with anyone.
    its fine if you broke it off. and its ALSO fine that she dresses that way. the same way you have the right to dump her is also the way she has the right to wear whatever.. its over and your both happy now that you don't have to put up with each others shit.

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  • It's not nice you are referring to her as a bitch you should have let it slide this time then after the date tell her it bothered you.

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  • You did nothing wrong. It is kind of wrong to call her a bitch, but if it's your breaking point, then it's final. It was your choice to make:)

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  • what she wears shouldn't be your main issue. If you are uncomfortable about her clothes, calmly discuss it with her like an adult. You have no right to restrict what she can and can't wear.

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    • U csn tell whats in a person's head by even how they walk. If she thinks showing her tits to the public whilst dating her man I ok, what other thought processes so u think is off with her? So wham stick around to find out more?

    • A persons clothes do not define them. It can be a way to express ones self. but it doesn't define them. Some people are comfortable with their bodies and are okay with showing it off. if you've got it, flaunt it. I don't see a problem in being comfortable in your own body and wearing what you want regardless of other's opinions. Dress for yourself, not others.

    • I have no problem with her wearing anything, don't get me wrong, but that day was something I considered to be special.

What Guys Said 28

  • "She was stupid enough", "That dumb bitch didn't wear a bra" , "That bitch deserved every bit of humiliation"

    Just the way u talk about her shows how u never really cared about her, one slight problem she did (and maybe she was not aware of it in the first place) and u flipped upside down treating her like she's ur worst enemy.

    I do agree dressing like that is really bad, i would be very pissed myself if my gf (someone i really care about) dresses like that in Public. But that's not the way u address a problem at all bro, u did it in the worst possible way.

    U noticed her wearing like that then first of all U ASK her; Did u realize ur boobs will show when u dressed like that? maybe she didn't know, and if she did maybe because she liked u too much that she wanted to impress u or turn u on (but if she already knew then it just implies she's not very smart).

    When that happens u just tell her how u feel, and that u don't want to see her dressing like that again. If she insists to dress like that then that's when u leave her.

    Telling her to take a taxi home was very rude of u and that probably hurt her bad. I'm surprised she still called u, it only means she really likes u and wants to make up for it or even apologize.

    Take it easy and revise yourself, u both did something wrong but the important thing is that both of u understand how each one went wrong. The only way to do that is to talk with each other in a calm and respectful manner.

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  • maybe it was a mistake. if she was a slut, or didn't care about you, she wouldn't call. and, honestly, even celebrities make that mistake some times dude, and the clothing designers get in Big trouble too.
    How are you bad, ok, we live in a society of excess, and people have nothing better to do than look for imperfection and perfection. every girl wants a man that'll walk their dog for them and treat it all nicely even if you don't like dogs. Why? It's a sign, that you have patience, that your going to treat their kids well, instead of Jerking on the leash violently you coax and call the dog to you, and that you'll treat your kids the same way as well. girls expect us to treat Every situation like this, even when we're embarrassed, you don't think kids would embarrass you? or that a daughter would make the same mistake? Look at paris hilton, she's someone's daughter. Her dad didn't have, That conversation with her, in public, and she didn't talk to anybody about That conversation. But she embarrassed him. That didn't mean that he, her dad, had to just, loose it right then and there on her.
    It's hard but your going to have to learn to put things in their perspective, the girls that is. I didn't know that it could have even been a mistake till my wife told me one day, I thought it was all on purpose and that, lol they were just being sluts. weird huh?

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    • Good one

    • its my wife. she took the time to explain it to me. without her, i'd be like, well. probably a lot worse than you dude.

  • You could've told her that you can see everything through.. she probably wanted to change then and you could've had a nice evening. Sending her home with the taxi and calling her names like "dumb bitch" or "slut" makes you a jerk. Perhaps it wasn't smart of her to choose a dress that shows through, but she didn't do it on purpose and probably wasn't even aware.

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    • I never called her those names before she and her friends started rumours about me man. And everyone believes them because I'm a guy up against 5 girls, and also because I dated her

    • Yeah shit like that happens.. maybe you didn't call her like that but you do write it in this message.. so you kinda look like a jerk if you choose that language.

      But just call her up, apologise for being rude and explain what was bothering you. If she is a nice girl you could take her out again (inspect clothing first).

  • I don't think you ever loved that girl. You could have discussed with her outside that expensive place and never entered it. Dumping this way was absolutely disgusting and i condemn this act.

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  • She was "dressing"i could maybe understand but because she "dressed"sounds one time bra. It seems you can't/couldn't communicate maturely with her man. Dumping a girl based on one event you've mentioned here is quite chilling cold to be frank with ya.

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    • It was the breaking point actually, there were a lot of things going on before this

  • There are less excessive ways to resolve conflicts, you're an idiot and you clearly have zero understanding of the consequences of your actions.

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    • How should I have dealt with this?

    • By not breaking up over wearing clothing you "disapproved of in public", I guess?
      Although technically you're calling her a "dumb bitch". She honestly should have known better to even talk to you and waste her time.

  • You should have just asked her to wear something else when you saw her, but the fact that she was wearing that might have hinted at something else. Maybe you didn't spend enough time under the sheets who knows. Point is don't go to a expensive place knowing full well that she dressed like that and go in and send her off that way. I personally would have stayed at her house and made a nice meal and gotten my jam on if you know what I mean.

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    • It was a see through when light falls on it. It looked normal when I picked her up. and well I didn't see her for a week maybe so I picked the perfect place to take her to, you know for what.

    • Ok but when you first noticed this did you ever ask her why she chose to wear the clothes she did? You still should have taken her with you when you left even if you were embarrassed what how would you have felt if something had happened to her?

  • I actually like it when my ex gf dressed sexy, if she chooses to, i have enough confidence to say that i know who she has sex with and that's me ;-). Being so conservative about it is your archaic outlook on society, the way you talk about her shows that you have no respect for her. you could have told her that she dressed wrong because of the "dresscode" required by the restaurant or wherever the fuck you were going. this misogynistic bullshit is getting on my nerves, just like blockheaded traditionalists that are still a reason out society is not able to make the final leap forward.

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    • Yea let's go around naked and call people who object to it misogynist.

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    • Stop replying to every other question then

    • I strongly agree with this.

  • At the end of the fucking day, she's gonna be with you and not those 10000000 guys that checks her out. The problem isn't with how she dresses it's with you. You can't stand it cause you're still insecure. Guys will check her out regardless.

    It's great that you broke up with her, you're not a bad guy. Now she could move on and find someone who could handle her.

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  • You are wrong. Was her clothing inappropriate, yes, however nobody deserves to get catcalled. You should have been more sympathetic instead of taking the side of the lustful men who eyed her. And you also should not have broken up with her or called her a "bitch" on here. She did not mean you any harm. I think you should apologize.

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  • Take it from a guy with an aversion to wearing pants, you did the right thing...

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  • Hoesntly I would be embarrassing as hell. I wouldn't want sumone who dress so inappropriate and flashing their skin to other guys when she's alrdy taken. Silly gurl's lel

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    • instead or thinking, wow she looks and i get some later. your insecurities are showing through friend.

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    • you know women dress like they want. one day revealing, the other day not so. if my body was super hot id wear around naked as well;-) don't say slutty, don't judge a book its cover. in the past i have met women who dress very sexy but were very monogamous, kind, intellectual and caring. you defend your point by labeling others, namecalling and what not. putting others down for the sake of your argument is a bad way of having an argument. it weakens your point and it seems you are at a loss because you don't trust yourself and women who do dress sexy. let me tell you, i got cheated on by girls that were the bookworm type, classy (as you would put it) and more conservative. clothing has NOTHING to do whether or not you get cheated on, lead on, etc. It is an assumption that dress sexy are more willing to flirt and being promiscious but that is not always the case.

    • @doriantheartisan LOL! Seriously did i call her names for no reason To? It's proven fact that she dresses doesn't she? A HAWT body u say? Correct. Only cocky and show off doods show it to get laid juz the same way at how slutty gurls dressed right? Lemme educate u, no matter what they wear or how they dress, everyone will cheat but the ones who dressed abit more appropriate have a higher chance of cheating and sleeping with other people behind ur back. Sumone who knows better won't open doors for cuties who dressed so inappropriate but guys who juz care about sex and sexual pleasures like u are more than welcome ;3

  • Did you meet her at this place or did you pick her up? I woulda mentioned something if possible before heading out. I think you were just a little harsh on the situation and could've just talked it over if you had a problem with it.

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  • Can I have her number?

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  • Hipster chicks talking again about misogynists...
    You did the right thing. You can't keep a slut.

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    • Exactly. thank you

    • Or y'all just don't got enough game or aren't man enough to keep one.

  • Bro you are lame as fuck get over yourself... Plain and simple this sounds like something you could have brought to her attention at any given moment that you felt that way. This happened to me and my chick a few weeks ago and i started dying laughing after noticing some old guy staring, I looked and sure as shit he could see through her top. Quit being a bitch and be happy that you have a girl

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  • If you didn't get a haircut or shave... what would she do? She would start 'suggesting' you shave and get a cut... because you 'look soooo cute'

    Now tell her not to wear something that is revealing, she'll brush it off...

    Double standard, no respect.

    Put your expectations and rules out on the table... if you end up not agreeing on things, move on... there's plenty of other woman out there...

    Feminism is one of the worst things for dating... Biology makes women want a dominant sexy guy... forget what the feminists say... it's pent up anger, in all seriousness...

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    • Well, if people get to know they can get their point across without calling me a misogynist and other stuff, like you did, I can actually learn. anyway thanks for the opinion

    • I didn't claim that... Just tell her you won't go out with her if she continues to dress like that... Simple. She doesn't agree? Move on.

    • And, if you cared for your girl... You should've sympathized while at the club... And now you can you logically tell her exactly why you don't like her dressing like that... It's an issue that can be avoided easily.

  • The best thing to do here would be to tell her in the most polite manner possible that you really aren't comfortable with what she is wearing. At the end of the day, it's her body and it's her choice whether to take into consideration your take on the matter. And at the end of the day it's also your choice to decide whether or not you want to be with someone who dresses like that/cares about it bothering you.

    With that being said, I personally would not have want anywhere with a date who was wearing a see-through dress with no bra.. Unless maybe we were going to a strip club...

    I knew just from reading this title you would have a lot of idiotic feminist bullshit opinions. You are absolutely justified in feeling the way you do, and I believe that most men would feel the same. There is absolutely no need for a woman to be wearing something so sexually provocative especially considering you are going on a date. It's just ridiculous.

    And good for you for not putting up with it.

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  • Maybe you should of talked about how she dressed before you guys went out lol

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  • You did a wise thing my friend. She wants to live life like a community girl... you deserve a reserved girl reserved just for you.

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  • that honestly isn't a good enough reason to brake up with someone if you felt uncomfortable with her wearing something you should of talked to her and if she wanted to be with you alone she would hopefully dial it down a bit also if she doesn't want to look bad (in her opinion) then so be it just carry a spare coat with you and hope to god it rains it,
    its sometimes obvious that she just wants to mess around with other guys in such a case you shouldn't be going out with her and should just Finnish the relationship (appropriately) not over the phone or after dinner
    and then go your separate ways there might be blow back but just take it like a grown adult and carry on with your life

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  • Depends on the level of (mature) communication regarding this, prior to the break-up.

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  • ur an idiot lol is she hot at least

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    • what u should have done was give her ur jacket or sweater to cover her up "in case she's cold". she woulda blown ur brains out and let u do butt stuff from behind after that dinner. u blew it.

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    • No.
      Filler

    • whts a filler

  • Not a good enough reason to break up

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  • you did right having some self respect

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  • Dem hos be hos, bro

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  • I don't think she's a bitch, or deserves to be called names, chances are she's got low self-esteem and needs validation via attention which if this is the case (or she may just like what she wears lol) then you're not wrong at all and probably saved yourself a headache like I have now.

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  • Yup, you are clearly evil incarnate.

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