Boyfriend broke up with me: Loves me but not inlove with me what?

so i am 21 and he is 23. Never had a fight always seem eye to eye. Everyone just went so smoothly with him, so easy to love each other. Had a few minor disagreements but nothing that was serious. We are in college and are going to graduate in spring. Been together for a year and 5 months.
He tells me he loves me all the time, takes such good care of me. I went to alaska balled my eyes out and wanted to come home he bought me a plane ticket home, when I left to go there he cried so hard. But I came back and everything was fine. He would tuck me in at night, tell me he loves me, text me good morning beautiful just the every day nice things.
Today however he was very quiet all day. He was stressed about not finding any help on campus about finding a job after graduation-he stressed hard. I tried to help him by giving suggestions. He had been to afghanistan and has recently had to discuss his problems about war to a counselor. He told me what htey talke dabout.
tonight, he comes over and is crying and says 'he loves me but isn't in love with me' he doesn't know how to explain it. he doesn't love himself.
What? He would say that i was the perfect girl for him and that he felt the same way everything went smoothly. He said we had problems because he couldnt give the affection i needed. im snuggly and he would push me away or not want a kiss. But why did he do this? I dont understnad was it just a bad day?
The past few days he's been walking around saying 'hes depicting the meaning of life.' ik then and there we were going downhill.


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What Guys Said 2

  • seems like he hasn't sorted out his own emotions out enough to be able to share it with you. he probably does love you. He may be going through PTSD, i know thats a bitch and your mind gets jumbled and you can't express emotions correctly. i say give him a little space, he loves you so he won't forget you, so when his mind swivels around to missing you, he'll find you.

  • "Love" and "In love" are two different things. Imagine three states: positive, neutral, negative. Now "in love": positive - he soars above all heights when thinking of you. And "Love": not negative (thus positive or neutral) - there can be times, when he might soar above all heights again when thinking of you, in other words being in love with you on occasions. But not at all times like in the beginning when he got to know you. Furthermore, it's not negative, so he won't have the guts to hate or even leave you forever.


What Girls Said 1

  • It sounds like he's got more going on with himself rather than on the relationship. He might need some time to think about what it is what he wants for himself in his future. You didn't do anything wrong. I think guys just get to a certain point in relationships where they freak out from commitment and start thinking about every aspect of their lives and what it is they want. Give him some space for a while and let him know if he ever needs to talk that you are there, but don't contact him for a while and see if he comes to you first. If he doesn't maybe try talking with him one more time and see how he is and what he's feeling then. Just try working on yourself for a bit and what is meant to be will fall into place!


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