Someone please help, I live with my ex boyfriend?

We were together 3.5 years. Originally he just wanted a break, but I was so upset that I made him choose between a break up or we work things out. He chose a break up because he wanted space and he felt pressured, like he was walking on glass around me. We moved to a new city so I didn't adjust well to being far from home, and it was a huge adjustment for me. I pushed him away because one of my friends (who was recently dumped) kept telling me he would leave me, or vice versa. I caused fights everyday, was a nagging bitch, etc. So anyways, he wanted time and space to figure out if he really wants to keep this going. Keep in mind we've wanted to stay together forever since earlyish on in our relationship. We both have the same goals in life (success, travel, family, etc), and over our relationship we grew closer.
BUT
He's been acting like my boyfriend? I don't get what he's doing. I told him once our leases is up I'm going to move out (for obvious reasons, living with your ex is very emotionally draining). But he wants to live together next year. He also has been sleeping in my bed, or I'll sleep in his, and he was holding my hand one night when we slept in the same bed (we haven't had sex since we broke up-just sleeping), but then I moved it because he's messing with me. I tried talking to him and he seems very eerie on trying again because he doesn't want to go back to fighting and then have to be officially done. If that makes sense. So he's been cuddly, tickling me, hugging me, complimenting me, asks me to go out on 'dates' (but we don't call them dates), he even asked me to go on a road trip with him next summer? I know some people say they've changed, but the last two months have been such a reality check, I've learned to pick my battles. I need advice on how to get him back.


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  • He obviously wants to work things out. It sounds like you are still doing what you were doing to cause the break up. THINKING TOO MUCH. Just keep doing what you guys are doing let it come naturally and your questions will be answered later. Don't jump for an answer just live your day and enjoy him.

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  • I've been in the same situation minus the different city. When it's closer to your lease ending ask him again if he wants to actually be in a relationship or not. If that's what you want. If he refuses then move out I promise you'll regret living together being exes. I can explain my situation more if you want.

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    • Yea please! It'll probably help.

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    • Oh wow that's awful. I'm sorry to hear.
      And it's not like I'm miserable, I'm glad I can still be around him, but it's hard not having the title ya know? And I'm not living with him if we're not together. That's a fact, it'll be too hard

    • Yeah we were in that spot for awhile where things were good and we lived together but weren't official. It's not the same. And that leaves the door open for either of you to change your mind at any time. Things can go downhill fast and it sucks being stuck in a lease with someone. Good luck to you I hope it all works out for the best!!

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