How do you get over someone who dumped you for another person?

It's almost been five months since my ex left me for another girl. He told me we didn't work out, because of the distance and then replaced me for another girl who was an exchange student going back to her country in a month.

This made me depressed because dated for over a year and he would always tell me that he loved me and wanted to marry. And he broke up with me all of the sudden and I was blind sided. I really loved him and thought he loved me...

I already deleted everything like messages photos contacts ect... But still he creeps back into my mind. Some thoughts about the good times, but most of the time (I don't know why), the thought of him just kissing, being intimate with this girl comes up (even though I have no idea what she looks like) and it just makes me depressed...

I'm just not sure what to do. I know I'm suppose to keep busy and improve myself, but are there any better suggestions to get over someone who dumped you?


Most Helpful Guy

  • what I find works for me is keep focusing on what my purpose in life is and to keep working hard & pushing forward to accomplish my goals. also what I would recommend you do is not think of someone dumping you as a way to show that your ugly or worthless but rather think of it as an opportunity to meet someone better & a person that you have much more in common with. I would see it as this: when someone dumps me it's not my loss but theirs because as each day passes I'm getting better, stronger, kinder, & wiser. while the person that dumped me is only getting older, uglier, & bitter with each passing day, so why would I cry over someone who's just getting worse?

    • also another key thing that could help is instead of wallowing in self pity try to help those that are less fortunate than you. you don't have to volunteer at a shelter but if you see someone in need, whether you're at the grocery store, or walking down the street, it would be great if you could go & help them. when you do trust me when I tell you that it feels soooo good when you're done helping them.

    • Thanks! haha That's a pretty funny way to think about your ex, they are just getting bitter haha. But yeah, I think after the break up, I did become stronger and interested in more things. It's a way of discovering yourself. Thank you for your advice

    • you're welcome. lmk if you need anything else!

Most Helpful Girl

  • If you have close friends to confide in, seek them out. Spend time with them. Go out on the town, buy yourself a drink. Dress to impress (yourself, not others), smile everywhere you go even if you have to fake it. Wrap yourself up in hobbies or activities that you'd been too busy or too afraid to try previously. Smile at that cute guy sitting across the bar from you.
    There's no foolproof way to get over someone who dumped you, especially when you were struck with the breakup so suddenly. There's no way to permanently write them out of your life, no matter how hard you try. What helps is to be so happy with how your life has turned out post-breakup that you don't even mind that you're single. Sure, you remember the good times with your ex and you sometimes wonder what he's up to, but then you remind yourself that you're about to go spend the weekend with your friends or you're about to have a great night out on the town. Try to recall what made you happy prior to your relationship and start from there. Good luck <3

    • Thank you !! although it's hard not to think about him, you are right, I need to remember the happy days before I met him. thanks

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Alcohol and single friends


What Girls Said 1

  • Well if she's going back to her own country soon then chances are things won't work out anyways then he'll be left with nothing and that's what he gets. Don't sweat it. It's not you, it's him. Move on, meet new people, that guy is probably undeserving of you anyway.


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