Can you give me an outside perspective of the situation please? Broke up because we're too young, but not following the most traditional way?

We started our relationship when he was 16.5 years old and i had just turned 18 (for the avoidance of misunderstanding me, i was born in a country in which children first go to school at the age of 7, then moved to another country where they start school at the age of 6), we were in the same class, both mature for our age and no playing games with each other. Big love and best friends. Living together for 4 years of university.
Fast forward 5 years from the day we got together, in about February , we started talking about a possible breakup, not because we didn't love each other or cared, but wanted to have more experiences, a better social life and to find ourselves outside of the relationship. We where very honest and it was not an easy talk. Summer came, we made sure we would take a long time wanted vacation trip, remained together for the summer and finally decided when summer is over we are too, and that was this month. It was a very peacefull and depressing break up, including a bit of shared crying. He said to me that it feels like he's giving up on the lottery after he has won it, and wants to continue having my friendship at least, because i'm his most beloved friend to whom he can talk freely about anything and be himself, the same applies to me too so we agreed to start seeing each other strictly as friends once a month, a phone call here and there, share any new found good music or moviesand travel together again, once we are ready. He does not exclude the possibility of getting back together in some years and neither do I. And one thing I know for sure is that he does not want to be in a relationship for a long while.
How does this situation look like to you?
Sorry for the long post and thanks for reading :)


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What Guys Said 2

  • Interesting. Obviously you two love each other but are you in love with each other. Do you love him enough to marry him and he you? If not then you both have been honest to each other about your feelings and will have a lifelong friendship. If you both do love each other enough to marry then you both have been dishonest and need reconcile and get together

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  • I don't agree with it at all. It sounds like you two were perfect for each other. Love doesn't just come around the corner every day. If you two truly are in love, how can you bear to give that up?

    It took me 26 years to find the woman of my dreams, so I have a much different view than you. Life is so much better when you are with someone that completes you, that makes you strive to be a better person cause you know they deserve you at your best.

    I would strongly advise you to rethink your decision. While I applaud you for your desire to grow and "find yourselves", why can't you do that together? My heart breaks reading the line your ex had about the lottery. He certainly sounds like a keeper.

    I understand why you did it; I just think it may be a mistake. Love doesn't just happen for most people. I think you should hang onto it.

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    • We are each other's first since we started dating very young.. when I say other experiences, aside from finding ourselves outside the relatioship, we want to date other people. I want it, he wants it. Not looking for another relatioship just other people. I've considered suggesting an open relatioship, but I'm not sure I could handle it.
      Also shit has happened between us, it wasn't perfect all the time..

    • Do what you think is best. Just remember that breaks often turn to break ups.

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