A simple question, what do I do?

So I LIVE with my ex boyfriend. We were together 3.5 years. We moved in together 3 months ago, and he broke up with me a month after we moved in together. We're stuck in our lease until June, and neither of us really wants to move out. He broke up with me because I was a mean girlfriend, I took him for granted, and overall I just didn't make him happy.
My question is, how do I get him back?
I've been working on myself and my happiness so I can be a better me, and I've changed in many ways. I'm happy with the break up because it made me realize how much he means to me, but I'm obviously devastated because we planned on getting married in a couple years.
What can I do? :(


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What Guys Said 2

  • If you actually worked on yourself and became happier, he'll be drawn to you. Unless the break up was for another reason, but was blamed on your attitude. its not hard to get him back. Just act natural, and not because you are about to lose a shot at marriage (yes i saw that, and the fact that you put that last has a lot of psychological ramifications..) it says a whole lot...

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    • How does it have psychological ramifications? I was thinking of writing him a letter so I can get everything out.

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    • Every time I try talking to him I don't say everything.
      In the letter I could explain everything. I pushed him away because one of my exes told me no one could ever love me, so when I met him I was scared and set myself up for failure. Then when he told me he loved me I was terrified of messing up so I tried pushing him away. I know it makes no sense, but I've been working really hard on changing that so that I don't let that affect me anymore. I've realized people can love me, and I wish I could get a second chance with him.

    • It actually makes a lot of sense. the part that doesn't make sense is why you would let someones words (probably said out of anger) to affect you. Now look at you, you messed up a good thing. I push people away sometimes too but thats because of MY words.. not someone else's. Im not sure you are going to get a second chance but i do believe that if you can't even talk to this person face-to-face, I don't think a letter will do much. You've probably hurt him more than you can imagine. (you know how hard it is to break up with someone you live with? he must have been past his breaking point.) if you want to even get a shot at a second chance... you need to do what we guys are forced to do. You have to grovel. thats right, you've gotta not only beg him for it, but show it as well. thats why i said work on yourself, get happier. In the end, you still have to beg face to face. if you feel you can't do this... then this is all doomed.

  • Hope for the best. As far as change. It comes from the inside. Change because you feel you need to. Don't try to change for someone else.

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