Why did he try change for me?

Okay so me & my guy friend we're seeing each other for a year and a half. We began to argue a lot. Things ended & we were on and off for about 2 months. In our last argument he said that he tried to change into the man I wanted him to be, but he couldn't change.

Thing was I never asked or wanted him too change, I feel in love with him for who he was why would I want to change that? Why did he feel the need to change for me?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Maybe he feels he is not 'man' enough for you... it happens. you should tell him that last line of your question description. It won't change much but it will change something.

    • I did tell him that. He says his minds made up, that the arguments did it for him. (Could he ever want to re-try if it was the arguments?) he says he misses me but it's just best if we don't stay friends anymore because of the what ifs. I miss him too, but things ended so bad.

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    • We mostly argued because he was scared of getting serious. It wasn't as straight forward as that but because after a year and a half I never knew where I stood with him, he would make plans (dates) but would always cancel & it just made me question everything so we argued. We both made mistakes but I never wanted to change him, I just wanted him to put more effort in & let me know where I stood

    • "i just wanted him to put more effort" I can see about 10 different ways that can go wrong. darling you have to pay attention to not only your words but your actions too. you can't tell me you didn't want him to change then turn around and say ^^^that^^^. also you said "... argued because he was scared of getting serious.." you WANT him to get "serious" (whatever that means)... that in itself is a change. so you can drop the "I don't want to change him" line. every girl always wants to change a guy, it can happen sooner or later but it happens. as for your need for "seriousness", its only been a year and a half. back up a bit, stop grinding/nagging on him about your "seriousness", just do something else, be someone else, he'll come to you and declare where you stand with him. its in our nature, if you try to force things on us, we run away, if you give us space, we run, but we run to YOU.

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