My boyfriend had two previous serious relationships end and the last one really hurt him... I want to end our 18 month relationship but feel bad because I know he will be really devastated. I broke up with him for two weeks before and he stopped eating, going to work etc... He won't be just be friends it's all or nothing but I hate the thought of hurting him.
How can I make it easier on us both?
Most Helpful Girl
As hard as it might be, Zalewe, and as hard as it is going to be on his heart, you are going to have to soften the blow by being gentle as a lamb but a straight shooter when telling Him------I want to end our 18 month relationship.
I am wondering if it Might not be a good idea to do it face to face. It may just pull on your own heart strings and make it harder than it is. You have already tried the 'Broke up with him for two weeks before' deal and found out what he is capable of. But you need to make him understand that you are going through things of your own, if you want to tell him this, and that time and some space is what you really Need right now.
Call him on the phone if you think this is better this time. I don't know how you approached or broached the subject before, but don't mention 'Friends' this time around, just lay it on the line that if anything changes you will call him and maybe you can talk.
If you are serious this time and don't want to look back, then No contact, no allowing yourself to Take him back by letting him attach his wallowing woes to your caboose... block him from your cell if you have to. You cannot make this a problem child pattern of breaking up and making up and breaking his vulnerable heart that he always wears on his sleeve, a full circle pattern. It's not healthy, not good for him or for you.
Naturally, many times with breaking off with someone, there is going to be repercussions. And with his other failed relationships in the past, he should be used to This by now.
Good luck. xx0