A couple of days ago my boyfriend of 1.5 years dumped me. I cried a lot and he ended up saying I should just forget it and that he's sorry. He has been weird ever since and I feel like he only lingers because he doesn't want to hurt me and because I always told him that I don't stay in touch with ex-boyfriends as it's too painful and (in my opinion) unhealthy. I know he still wants me in his life as a friend at the very least.
Because of him being weird I suggested that he only lingers for those reason but deep down inside wants to break up. He said "but you are many things to me. You matter a lot". I told him that these things might be true. But that he doesn't love me. I also added that "I feel so empty". All he said to this was "don't be". I asked him "since when" referring to the not loving me part. And he only said "I don't know".
What should I do? I know he doesn't want to hurt me but the fact is that he IS hurting me. It's inevitable. I don't want him to stick around for the wrong reasons.
Should I just cut contact now? I feel like if he doesn't love me, it's inevitable that he will leave eventually. And I don't want to be with someone who doesn't love me. So it seems the pain is inevitable so I might as well face it now.
What to do?
Most Helpful Guy
You should cut contact off. Having an ex that you miss and care about in your life as a friend is only going to mess with your head. He sounds like a caring guy, he obviously doesn't want to hurt you, but that's not a reason to stay with you. If you let it linger, and drag it out, it's only going to delay the healing process and it will take even longer for you to get over him. Every relationship that ends hurts someone. Everyone in the world can tell you that time heals all wounds, but when you're going through it, it doesn't feel like it will. If he says he doesn't love you anymore, he's not going to back to feeling that way.
There is no sugar coating it. You will hurt, you will feel empty, you may feel sick to your stomach, you will feel depressed. You might not want to eat, or want to do nothing but eat. There is no way around it. The sooner you start the grieving process, the sooner you will get through it and move on. Spend time with family, with friends, find things to do to distract yourself. I've been through it, and if you spend time alone and think about it too much, you will drive yourself crazy. Eventually, you will be ok. Good luck!!!0