How should I approach this? *Please read*

What should I do about my ex-girlfriend?
Two months ago my ex-girlfriend and I (went out for a year and a half) broke up mutually but it was I who initiated the conversation. We tried being friends for about a week, and then I asked her if she would like to try again.. to which she said no and refused to. I'll admit, I was hurt by this so I decided that the best thing to do for myself was to go No Contact. I did this for about two weeks (I ignored all of her texts) and then we started talking again by the end of that month. I found out that she had been seeing (and hooking up) her ex since the first day we broke up and she told a mutual friend of ours that she realized she loved me as a friend and wasn't IN love with me. So, once again I decided it was best for myself to keep doing No Contact and move on with my life despite all of her attempts of texting me saying that she had been thinking about me, felt bad about the way things ended, missed me, loved me, and wanted me to know that she wouldn't change a thing from our relationship. I'm a bit skeptical with some of those things and feel like she wants me in her back pocket as an alternate plan. She's been telling all of our mutual friends that she misses me and tells them to tell me that...

The both of us attend the same college.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just because two people Break up doesn't means they can't and don't Make up and it's Good-bye, my love forever. And with an "EX" that still Marks an X in your soft spot with an X of her own, there is usually Motive in mind and if given Opportunity-----Despite all of her attempts of texting me...
    She most likely is Missing the Kissing, Misses the history you both once shared. She wants you around, however, at her convenience, and when she doesn't Want you ------She wants me in her back pocket as an alternate plan when she doesn't have anyone else she is Seeing or when she Needs someone who was close to her to make her feel she is still wanted.
    She is playing head and heart games with you, sweetie... she was even trying to get back up with her Other Ex when your own broken down relationship wasn't even cold in the ground yet. I find this a slap in the face to you and as long as you allow her, Enable her to get away with whatever she pleases, she will Continue to make you stand there with egg on your face.
    I don't trust her, this little sweetie tweetie bird. She has already come forth and your own mutual friend how she really feels about you. She doesn't want to be two birds of a feather, wants to be this free bird and while she is out there, she feels she has these Hot coals about her that will keep you coming back for more with what she has in store for you and who knows... that could very well be a Friends with benefit factor.
    Stick to your guns, I see a Raised Red flag with this little filly... No Contact and move on, little doggie...
    Good luck. xx

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Move on u wasting ur time
    Time to new realitionship

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What Girls Said 2

  • You should talk to her face to face and ask her what she wants. Tell her everything you've heard and let her explain it. If she says she wants to try again, don't accept it immediately. Say that you need time to think about it because it is an important decision, and meet in a week or so. In the meantime you should think about why you guys broke up and if there is a way to fix it. She says she wouldn't change a thing from your relationship but that doesn't sound very reasonable, as you broke up, I would say you have to modify the things that led to that break up.
    You have to use your brain more than your heart for this time. Because obviously there are some feelings for her that reside in your heart, but you have to use your mind and think objectively and figure out if the relationship would work out, or it would lead to another break up.
    And if she really hooked up with her ex, that doesn't necessarily means that she doesn't still have feelings for you, maybe she was trying to move on and forget about you by doing that but realized it is impossible?

    Sometimes relationships don't work out, if you keep trying it is just going to make both of you suffer. Some couples just need a break. Figure out which one is this one. What is important is that you don't go back together because you miss each other, that is not a valid reason as that feeling would disappear over time and is not strong enough as a foundation for a relationship. If you go back together, it has to be because you love each other and you are better together than single. It can't be because you feel alone, or because you are attracted to her (make sure it is not that!). You don't mention the reason of your break up, but if you don't change anything it is not likely to work out.

    Hope it helps!

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  • I would move on and keep friendship if I can.

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    • What she said. Move on. No one deserves to be plan B.

    • Exactly, no one deserve to be plan B. If she wanna take a break she might be single. I think she is too young to understand what she want.

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