Ladies and Gentelman: thoughts on my last break up? We dated for 2 years and broke up a year ago. Just venting for some reason?

We were at a show one night. When the show was coming to an end she got invited to a party at her friend Mikes house. I didn't want to go so I went home. The next morning she texted me distressed. She was saying how ill "never forgive her". I asked if she cheated on me, she said no. All was she was saying was she fucked up by sleeping at Mikes. I was trying to piece together how in any way I'd be angry at her for that. We agreed to meet the next day and talk. My approach was "you slept at Mikes house. I guess this is weird but but nothing happened so let's move on from this." She insisted we break up. I was heart broken, and we agreed to establish "a break."

In the following days I saw her and the bass player of Mikes band talking all over social media. His name is "Andy" and they met at the party. They were flirting and hanging out. I'll never know for sure if she physically cheated that night, but it's clear she did emotionally. I was disoriented and refused to let myself believe that. I was sure there was hope for us.

We spent the month in relationship limbo. Back and forth between her loving me one day, and wanted nothing to do with me the next. It was exhausting and confusing. It hurt to wake up in the morning.

At some point between our fluctuating status, she officially called it off. The very next day there was a show in the city. One of my favorite bands, so I had something to look forward to. However, my ex was at the show -one day after we broke up, with a new boyfriend - A TOTALLY different guy than the one she initially met at that party. I was mind fucked at this point.

Now I was officially over her the idea of her (finally, right?) The feelings were still there, but the idea of her as a girlfriend was completely stripped from my mind. I pressed on and focused all my energy to my career, and to establishing new powerful relationships with friends/family. All of which put me back together. To this day she still tries to contact me.


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What Girls Said 1

  • You are better off without her, sweetie. She showed her true colors starting at 'Mikes house,' which to this day, you will never really know what happened and then, like she this Town Cryer, she plastered this guy "Andy" 'All over social media' as though he were some Wing ding King that she ended up being the life at the party with... however, I have my own hunches the party didn't end just there with them with a lamp shade on their heads...
    Now, with everything that has been said and you both being so Done, she has this newbie number on her arm, and no matter Who it might be, any Tom, Dick or Harry or some schmo from Idaho, she probably will always remember the best thing that ever happened to her and that's Why-----To this day she still tries to contact me.
    You have put the broken pieces of your life back together again, sweetie. You have learned to be without her, 'Focused all my energy on my career,' and even Instituted 'New powerful relationships with friends/family.' All of this is something you worked effortlessly to do. Don't ever look back, don't Ever Turn back. She is a born cheating cheetah, a fickle pickle who will only drive you insane, and if something falls apart for her, she will always be back, in this full circle pattern, to have you pick up her own pieces for her... don't be her Enabler, never give her another chance to bring you down nor tear you down again.
    Good luck, keep up the good work. xx

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    • really appreciate you taking the time to give me such a thought out opinion.

      Thanks for the support, it means a lot.

    • You are so welcome.. it's because a nice guy like yourself who never meant someone like her any wrong, just has a heart of gold, and sad to say, she let the best thing that ever happened to her go by.. it's her loss, however, she is in a pattern, just let her go, you deserve better. xx

What Guys Said 1

  • You handled that pretty good.
    I guess I'd be mentally fucked up and unable to do anything for... well at least 2 or 3 days.
    So, very grown up way of dealing with it, and don't worry things will go on and eventually get better.

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    • Thank you, I definitely tried my best to handle it like an adult. She really walked all over me and I was just trying to handle it i a way where I regained as much of my dignity as possible. Thanks for the support.

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