Ex continues to contact me.. Dont know why she is doing it?

Hi there,

I have had quite the confusing time with my ex girlfriend, We broke up a month ago, But we haven't went a week without her contacting me in some capacity.

This weekend was maybe the most confusing, I seen her on Friday evening at a club but did not speak to her as she left soon after I arrived, on the Saturday night I received a text asking why i ignored her... I didn't but she claimed i did. I didn't reply after i claimed i did not ignore her.

Then i recieved another message whilst she was drinking, saying we should go out and talk about stuff etc... I messaged her on Sunday asking if she was serious about this and she claims she doesn't remember sending the messages.

I dont know whats going on here? i dont want to pressure her for answers or that... But i know she will probably be in contact again.

what do you guys think?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm kind of going through the same Shit with my ex girlfriend man.
    She texts me sometimes just about random stuff and I don't get what her intentions are.

    What I do is I'm just being polite and playful about it but I keep the texting back to 3 - 5 max. I asked her recently if she wanted to do something fun and she said she had a busy time with school now and blablabla. So I said okay, let me know when your schedule is more open and I left it at that.
    Now I notice that she reaches out more while I'm not reaching out at all. I'm letting her have her space and initiating all the contact.

    I'm also not gonna bring up getting together until she does. Because I know that would project neediness and that I desperately want to see her.

    I only want to see her if she is willing to ask me herself, she wanted me gone right? I never asked for that and I'm not going to settle for someone who sorta wants to see me but sorta doesn't. That would be a waste of time.

    To cut a long story short, I think you shouldn't reach out anymore and let her come to you at her own pace. If she reaches out, try to set a date with an exact place and time. If she's not into that, say that she can call you when she changes her mind, but that you're not going to settle for being just friends. That's not what you want right? When she contacts you, don't bring up getting together until she does. Just keep your texts then to a minimum and always be charming and playful without projecting neediness. Then after 3 - 5 texts say "it was great to hear from you, I gotta run, keep in touch."
    When she finally brings up getting together, focus on having a good time and don't bring up the relationship.

    That's my approach at the moment, and so far I'm noticing she's contacting me more and more.

    In the meantime, go hang out with other women, maybe you'll run into someone better :)

    Good luck bro, rooting for ya.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I think she miss you. And all good feelings that she ever had for you. It still for you.

  • Who ended the relationship?

    • She ended it claiming she needed time and space as we had a rough patch which made her unhappy

    • In that case, I assume she is second guessing the decision to end the relationship. She clearly still isn't sure what she wants, i. e. claiming she doesn't remember sending that text. There is no way anyone would actually forget sending such a thing. There's not much you can do right now. You're right, you shouldn't pressure her for answers, chances are she doesn't even have an answer yet because she seems entirely confused about what she wants. I'd say give it some time and perhaps try to avoid contact with her so she can have her time and space (hey, she asked for it) to truly and thoroughly think about what she wants.

What Guys Said 0

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