My ex girlfriend of 4 years left me and has a boyfriend in less than 2 months time?

Ok.. so my ex and I were together for 4 years. We were each others first. She left me 2 years ago saying she wasn’t happy, got a new boyfriend within a month, and then two months later contacts me saying she’s sorry and wants to get back together. I love her so much so I accept. We try again. Fast forward to eight months ago and I do some stupid things but we decide to work it out. Then in September we had a fight and she decides she wants to break up. She had just told me the month before how she had a “gut feeling about us since the day we met”, that we would last forever. She then goes and starts dating another guy within a week. But after about 1 month and a half I contact her and we start talking again. We say that we love each other. Text from morning til night, kiss, everything. I call her my heart which I had never done before and she got all teary-eyed when I said it and said so herself that she was so moved. However I did say I wanted to take it slow so we don’t rush into things again. She agrees. I found out that she kept my love note that came with the flowers I sent her when we broke up recently in the box where she keeps the watch I bought for her last Christmas.

Anyway, 3 weeks after we start talking she does a complete 180 and says she wants to break up for good this time. I ask her how she could go from loving me and wanting to try again to wanting to break up. She doesn’t give me an answer.

2 weeks later I see her at an event holding hands with another guy. Not the same guy from 2 months ago. Breaks my heart.

We live in the same neighborhood a few days ago I see her and her family, then I also see this new guy with them. They see me and he sort of puts his hand around her shoulder. I walk the other way. I can’t believe that she went from breaking up with me to bringing a guy home to meet the family in less than 2 months.

How can she move on so quickly?


Most Helpful Girl

  • She was/is hurting and lonely after the break-up, naturally. When girls feel that way, they want a guy to comfort them. It's one of the easiest ways to get some new perspective. It doesn't mean she will never come back to you... but dating someone else in the meantime might give you a new perspective, too.

    • What do you mean with new perspective?

    • Sometimes when we are in a relationship we get very wrapped up in that person and what our life is or could be with that person in our lives. Insert a new person that you're interested in, along with their ideas, and the part that the other person plays in your life will seem a bit more diminished. That will give you a clear outlook on how important she really is to you, and whether she is truly a positive or a negative influence on you.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You don't want to keep doing this yoyo relationship with her. Be done with it and don't think about her and her BF of the day. She would definatley divorce you if you ever got married because she always thinks the grass is greener. i dated someone like this in HS as we were off and on 3 times. The last time she came back but I simply said no. I really cared for her but it was a dead end and I had oats to sow.

    • Sounds like good advice...

    • Maybe you are right but I'm still madly in love with this girl and I was planning a future with her. I just can't seem to let it go.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Not worth thinking about. In fact you need to work on moving on, yourself. Some people are very uncomfortable with being alone and rebound to try to help themselves move on. Doesn't sound like she was ever really committed to your relationship. Sorry :(


What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like she has her own problems and constantly needs to find someone new/needs male attention. These kind of women are dangerous, even if it does seem they are emotional and nice people. You need to find someone who is happy with just you!


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