He is in denial that I broke up with him, still trying to make contact with me?

I broke up with him yesterday but today he sends me a, good morning lover. I didn't reply, he's still trying to talk to me over Facebook. Is he having a hardtime letting go?
After i broke up with him he sent a text saying, please answer. he doesn't want to do this anymore. I'll be by your side no matter what. I can't handle not being with you. I love you.
I had to call cause he has the tendency to do stupid shit when he's upset like drinking excessively or taking pills to forget. I had to make sure he was okay, yes my decision still stands. It's over. But I don't know if he took the phone call as a makeup, because I sure as hell didn't. When I say goodbye, I mean it.
Do I just continue to ignore his messages today? What do I do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • By constantly going back to him because of his tendencies (aka his manipulating you through concerns), you're reenforcing his dependency on you.

    You're not his guardian. Cut contact.

    • I am cutting contact. He's blowing up my phone and I'm not answering a single message. I'm hoping he's not going to show up on my doorstep to ask questions. I'm 100% done, I want him to see that.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Whoa hold on. You need to recognize right now that you are not responsible for his actions or checking up on him.

    He is unstable and you are feeding his actions by continuing contact with him. Do not respond to him again. If he sends you a message that he's doing something harmful or dangerous, you contact the police to report it and have them check up on him.

    Further you need to keep a log of his contact. While he may just be on the dramatic side, his behavior is a red flag for behavior that can spiral out of control. You need documentation of any escalating behavior if you need to seek help.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Well, why did you two break up?

    • He broke up with me first because I didn't let him drive when he was on his insomnia medicine, he later contacted me saying he understands why I did that and he forgave me. The second time, I said my mom is never going to let me see you again and he wanted me to fight with her to do so. I refused and he said goodbye. So today he's like, I can't live without you! I can't stand not to have you by my side then he's asking to go behind my moms back, lie where I am to go see him and I said no. Then he's like I can't live without you, I love you. So I'm like, goodbye. I can't deal with this anymore.

    • Well, a relationship ending due to parental disapproval is quite sad. On the other hand, you probably don't love him as much if you're not willing to override your mother, and I can kind of see why...

      This guy kind of seems sketchy (the first breakup - I mean come on), so yeah...

      Well, I'd say that you ought to go no-contact and let him sulk and cry his eyes out on his own and he'll ride it out until eventually he accepts it and gets on with your life.

      But you should do the same and terminate all contact (except maybe for birthday's, etc, I guess you could text a quick "happy birthday" and leave it at that and to return possessions).

    • Yeah, I said I'm not choosing one over the other. I'm choosing myself to avoid hurting them both.
      He said he will never touch prescription drugs again, but I don't believe him since he's always asking to see my moms pill cabinet.
      Maybe if he cleans up and gets his act together, but he's quite stubborn saying he doesn't need help.
      But another reason I cut if off because he's pushing the sex too far, he's very touchy and he's like its a sign of love. It's only a sign of love if two people want to do it, not one. He's constantly pushing me to try and he gets butt hurt when I say no.
      When he was going through an episode, we started off with kissing but he kept trying to feel me through my pants but I kept stopping him everytime. I told him he wasn't himself and he's making me uncomfortable and I also told him he was forcing me to do what I don't want to do. He got mad.
      My only does he have drug issues, he's really manipulative and has mood swings.

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