Has anyone here been divorced?

Is there anyone here who has been through a divorce and had to go about gathering evidence on their own to use to help their case? If so what were your methods and what kind of evidence did you collect?


Most Helpful Guy

  • In most states, it's easiest to go through a no-fault divorce. One person says there are irreconcilable differences, and the other person agrees. You save yourself a lot of money if you can divide your belongings yourself. If you cannot, you are dividing your assets between yourself, your spouse and your attorneys.

    When I got divorced, I walked away. I gave up my interest in the appreciation of the home in the time we were married and the value of investments in the property while I was there. I declined to fight for a share of her retirement accounts. If I went after her retirement accounts, she would have gone after mine and when you account for the penalties and attorney fees, both of us would have lost money.

    If you have to get away, you are better taking what you want and fighting it out later. From what I have seen, if you own a house, the person who leaves gets screwed a lot more than the person who stays.

    Evidence of anything but assets is not that relevant to most civil divorce unless you have kids. Then it's a matter of proving who is worthy of custody. Disagreeing means that you pay attorneys more. If you need to bolster a case that you should have custody, your attorney can tell you what you need to do. I am not an attorney, but I would recommend a free consultation with one.

    • What if the wife suspects the husband of cheating can she or the attorney find ways to prove that he is and can he close his kids because of it?

    • No he can't "lose the kids" due to infidelity. He will have joint custody unless you can show he is an unfit parent -- is unable to maintain a safe home, or is abusive to the children.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I've been divorced. What are you trying to prove and why? Are there children in the marriage? How much money do you have? Have you talked to a lawyer? Usually the first consultation is free.

    If there are no children, the judge just has to divide the marital assets. If there are children, then the judge will also define custody, visitation, and child support.

    • Trying to claim custody of children because husband is suspected of cheating and trying to find ways I can somehow prove that he is.

    • Infidelity does not disqualify someone as a parent. Judges really don't care who did what to whom.

  • Evidence? Of what? Abuse? Misspending?
    You have to be pretty forthcoming with all the info. The opposing or your attorney will look to see if there's any hidden assets.
    What you don't agree to split evenly or this for that will then be decided for you.


What Girls Said 1

  • Some users have been.


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