Married n separated n 4days due to past affair.. can't forget my bf still... please tel what shud I do now?

Hi I'm 28yrs female.. loved my bf for more tan 8yrs.. but parents dint accept due to caste prob n forced me to marry someone.. husband left me n just 4days of marriage knowing I was n contact wit my bf post engagement.. he filed divorce now.. I begged him a lot to forgive me n give one chance to live wit him.. but he s too stubborn to do tat.. as I already did tis marriage without my wish tis made me feel more terrible.. my bf had te courage to speak to my parents only aft my engagement.. but tey dint accept... so he asked me to come out but I cudnt do t being only daughter to my parents... I had been tellin my bf since 2yrs to take steps to marry me but as he was prep for his masters he dint do t... I fought a lot wit my parents but they threatened me n did tis marriage... now I'm regretting my decision of not married my bf... I contacted him again aft al tis prob as I felt so heart broken... I felt his love has never changed and n due course he said he needs me n ll try to make his parents accept somehow.. but suddenly few weeks back he said his mom told he can't marry me til she s alive n they seen a gal for him... I cudnt bear tis at al n spoke to tat gal n stopped tat alliance... I even called n cried to his parents... but al n vain... he was angry on me for spoiling tat alliance... now they have seen another gal.. I got wel he won't marry me... but I can't be without his love as none can love me like he did... n I too can't like anyone again... if I cud I d have lived wit my husband now forgetting my bf.. now he says he wants to be n contact wit me always as he stil loves me te same.. but I can't bear him wit someone... I can talk til he marries one.. aft tat I ll feel so hurt... now I'm drowning n my past n feel so lonely n rejected by everyone... I don know what shud I do... te more I try not to contact my bf I end up sendin him a message... I don wanna be his secret love al aft his marriage... but can't forgethim too... he doedoesn't like me talking to any guy even now... please suggest me what to do

Updates:
Can anyone please help me.. married separated due to past affair n can't forget my bf

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  • This is very unhealthy move on with your life. you will found someone who will love unconditional where you will forget about your ex. He is not good for you. Trust me I been there

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    • Hi sry... by mistake I have pressed te down arrow symbol as I was trying to look how to reply u back... Don mistake me please.. n thanks for ur kind advice... prob s watever my bf does I cudnt hate him r forget him... n I always end up regretting my decision of not marrying him having a terribly failed marriage... ter might be someone who ll love me but I really have no hope for tat.. also I was so dependent on my bf n cudnt live without his love r support n anything I do... I really have a very weak heart tat can't accept al tis...

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