How to get over this?

I dated this guy who was quite a bit older then I for abut 3 months. I know it's not that long of time, but I really fell hard for him. We had the most amazing time each time we were together. Decided to go for a mini vacation, but 2-3 days before that he started to tell me that he feels confused and thinks he may still have feelings for his ex. I asked if it's a good idea to go away together since that was the case, and he encouraged me saying that yes, we just need to go away (he had a convention to attend). We went, and everything was awkward from the get go. That first day we slept in different beds, no hands holdin- nothing. Next morning, 5 am phone rang and it was his ex. They talked on the phone as if I wasn't there, and it crushed me to pieces. We were there for the next 3 days, barely talking to each other, and since we came back we haven't talked to each other, no texts other than me telling him how much he hurt me. Now knowing all this, and how sh*tty he went about it all, why am I still miserable and sad. Why can't I let go and get over it. It's been 3 weeks since then and I am at the same spot where I was back then. When will I get better.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Ya know... I fell hard after only three months and got dumped too.. It can happen. I went no contact.. Its hard but i think its the only choice.. You dont want to become his part time play thing.. We have to love ourselves more than someone who treats us poorly.. Go out and date others.. Even if u dont feel that spark, you will realize that other guys will appreciate you.. The even better " right one" will come along... Stay strong..

    • Thank you. I'm trying and I just have such a hard time with everything-all day long. I NEVER felt like this before, and I've had 3 prior relationship, all 3 a very long term relationships, go figure.
      Totally off topic, but your name wouldn't be from somewhere in Europe would it? lol

    • Well in did live in germany a few years ago.. But usa now.. by the way.. I have read a lot lately cause i could not figure out why this shorter relationship bothered me soooo much.. They say sometimes its because of unresolved grief from past relationships that is cumulative. Interesting to think about..

    • You know I seriously thought about this a lot. I'm pretty sure it does have something to do with it.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Its still fresh. Give it time.


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What Guys Said 1

  • We'll find it hard to leavy someone, even if we know that person had died!

    • So true. I just don't understand why this hit me so hard.

    • We hate to lose anything we have. Over and above this, my theory is that women, when they fall in love, do so very intensely. This is specially true in the first phase (3 months to 2 years) of the relationship. After that, they usually forget or ignore their guy... or give them very, very little seX!

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