Should I tell him how I feel or keep the upperhand?

My ex-boyfriend broke up with me back in like December, he said some pretty hurtful things like that he felt "obligated" to talk to me all the time and just things that made it seem like he never enjoyed the relationship. I was pretty upset, especially because HE was the one who asked me to be in the relationship in the first place, and because I never complained when we'd go a while without talking because I understood we were both really busy and I basically never forced him to do anythig. After he said all of those things all I said was "Yeah that's fine" because I refused to show him that he hurt me. Hadn't talked to him since. Well a few days ago I got a random text from him, and he claimed it was one of his idiot friends, after he apologized for the text he then attempted to strike up a conversation, he even said "long time no see!" And it pissed me off for obvious reasons. I was just being short with him and told him "nice talking to you" after a while to end the conversation. But now I'm just remembering how hurt I was by all the shit he said when he broke up with me and I just want to tell him how much of a piece of shit I think he is, All of my anger is just coming back to me and I want him to actually know how much he hurt me. But now I feel like I have the upper hand, from his sad attempt to talk to me again and I'm not sure if I actually want to show him how I feel.


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What Guys Said 1

  • There's a saying and you don't always tip your hand. Keep it in your back pocket, and "let it go, Let it go..."

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What Girls Said 1

  • I agree that you have the upper hand and that telling him that he's hurt you wouldn't be a good idea. The thing is he most likely knows he was an asshole to you and hurt you. The best you can do now is just simply ignore him if he contacts you again. That will get to him more than anything you could possibly say to him. Nothing is as bad as being outright ignored. I think it's excellent that you said "yeah it's fine" when he threw all those hurtful things in your face in the first place, god knows I wouldn't have been able to remain calm but later on would have wished I had reacted like you! So you're on a good way! If you let him know how much he hurt you, you most likely wouldn't feel better, and he'd get the satisfaction of knowing that you still "care" somewhat, or care enough to let him know anyway. Don't do it. Just ignore him, or be cold to him if he gets in touch.

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    • Lol I actually ended up telling him last night, people were taking too long to answer, but honestly I think I made the right decision. I sent him a message just full of emotion and me telling him how he actually hurt me by all of those things. He ended up replying and we talked briefly about it, like an actual open talk and just looked at both of our sides to it. It ended up making me feel so relieved and bringing me a lot of closure to the situation that I was really lacking.

    • It's good that it made you feel relieved. I'm still kind of proud of you that you didn't freak out when he said those things to you because I always wished I was calm like that ;-) Honestly though, it's good that it had a good outcome and you feel better now. That's all that matters.

    • Lol well thanks, I just hate letting people get the beat of me. And very true :)

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