Did you ever had unrequited love? How did you got over it?

please tell how did you get over it. I'm over thinking and my head hurts. I want to get over him. His thoughts are 24/7 in my head and am messing my career goals in the process.
And i can't think of getting into relationship with anyone else at this moment so please don't suggest me to find someone new. please help.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • The most important thing that allowed me to gain immense freedom in this aspect is to understand more about love.

    First of all i don't want you to try and forget him. Its not going to work and it will probably only makes things worse for you.

    I need you to understand that love is not the same as the feelinfs you have for him. The feelings do not need to be justified. People can have feelings for someone that abused them and they really hate for example. It can be very confusing if you dont understand the difference as love itself is the act of loving someone for who they are umconditionally.

    Now that you know you can hopefully separate your feelings from him because feelings are just there. They dont have to be for anyone. When they toned down a little look at a picture of him without thinking. If they increase its tied if not then its not. Seperating takes time so dont worry if they increased just avoid any fantasy's about him and it should go away eventually.

    Now the next key bit is obviously your love for him. The truth is this does not have to go. I loved a girl deeply who had a boyfriend. We where close friends. But because i had no feelings for her i wasn't hurt and it was much fun.

    Think about if you really love him for who he is.
    If you don't? Then that is the easier situation. Every time he pops up in your head dont get romantic fantasies about his smile but think about how it is better this way and about how he is not who you want.

    But what if you do? This one is hard to answer. Personally i still had a great friendship with the girl so i realised that wouldn't go. Things where not different i only missed out on something more. I adjusted my thoughts accoordingly. Rather then thinking about romantic and intimate things i thought about things we do as friends.

    It will take some time and it might feel forced at first, but your mind will adapt to these thoughts.

    I wish you best of luck as this is never easy.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It took me a while but at first, I just avoided him as much as possible and I tried to occupy my time doing things that I love and meeting new people really helped, not as romantic interests but friends

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What Guys Said 3

  • Yea once, we were friends since practically kindergarten, high school sweethearts after we decided to be together we found out that we had actually fallen in love with each other without even knowing it before she moved, when I was with her older sister and she was with my friend. And didn't know how to tell each other or even if we should have. After she moved away I waited until me and her sister broke up naturally and her and my friend did the same, overall I waited over a year I reconnected, we talked, reminisced, flirted, eventually I asked her out. And that led to my first genuine love that was received and reciprocated you know it must be real, when the thought of them being in danger pops into your head and the instinct to sacrifice yourself for them happens.

    After she left me know even though I know she still had feelings for me I know she wouldn't get back together with me, her education was more important then even me. And if you love someone set them free, it's been years now and I have moved on but my love for her will never cease and there will always be a piece of her in my heart and in the back on my mind both giving me strength and poisoning me. but I don't and will not let it interfere with current relationships or prospects for the future, I'm ready to move on and find it again.

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  • i was/am going through the same thing as you. its been 2 years since i split with my ex and still think about her all the time, and dream about her nearly every night.

    its getting easier now though, and I'm starting to think about her a little less everyday. Nothing you can do but wait it out and keep busy im afraid. you'll move on eventually.

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    • They life is a cruel mistress, but I'd say love is even crueler, just have to take it day by day lol.

  • Yeah I did... It took me over a year.

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