Why do guys act like a**holes when they broke up with you?

I was dating this guy for almost four months and he broke up with me on Thursday and he said that he wanted to see me as a friend and so on. I asked him what's the reason, he didn't give me a reason and then some harsh words was exchanged by both of us. Then he said that he didn't feel like talking and I haven't talked to him since then.

He hasn't deleted me from Facebook but I caved in today and sent him a message asking if he was still mad at me. He has seen the message and been on Facebook several times since I sent the message but he won't reply, it's like I didn't mean anything to him which hurts.
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I don't understand why he wants to remain friends and keeps me on Facebook (one time he said that when he doesn't want to keep a person in his life he deletes and blocks that person, so they won't be able to contact him. He hasn't even blocked me on instant messaging apps) but he doesn't want to talk to me. I'm just so confused. He was so sweet and caring before Thursday and he always replied to my messages.

Why do you guys act like a**holes when they get what they want? I mean seriously, how is it possible to stop caring for a person you saw regularly and talked to everyday for four months just like that and become so heartless and cold?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It is not something specific to men.
    A break up is a break up, it's never something happy. Sometimes, you break up just because you feel like it isn't going anywhere and you don't see yourself in a relationship with the person so you end it.
    As for harsh words, it's pretty common when you break up with someone.

    Also, about his attitude? he's not going to act like before because it's not like before. Being friend with an ex is rare, it doesn't happen often and is probably awkward. He's not going to care and be sweet like when you were together obviously.

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    • I completely understand that but this happened on Thursday and asked him why, he said that he don't feel like talking... It's like he's acting like I was the one who broke up with him.

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    • The thing that I maybe shouldn't had said was that I told him feel used, but I'm allowed to have feel whatever I want without someone blowing up in my face and go all a**hole on me. He told me that I never gave anything back which is not true at all. He told me one time that he's a sensitive guy so maybe he took my comment harder than I think he did.

    • You have the right to feel lie this but he also the right to react the way he did because you could have trigger his reaction without knowing it. You don't know the reason he broke up and saying you felt used, obviously upset him.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I think you have it back words, he's hurting too and trying to figure out how he feels about you. He hasn't blocked you, because he's still wanting to be friends, but hasn't contacted you yet because he is still sorting through his feelings. Give him time, guys hurt too, but guys deal with it differently. With drawing and reevaluating is a typical guy behavior for emotional pain.

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  • because you probably did something to deserve it.

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    • Wait what? I'm not innocent but I wasn't the only one who kept going on with the name calling. The only thing that I said that might be considered bad is that I told him that I feel used. I'm allowed to have feel whatever I want without someone blowing up in my face and go all a**hole on me.

What Girls Said 2

  • He's not an asshole, you are just perceiving him as one, because you were broken up with. You still see yourself as having the right to access to him as a girlfriend, but you don't have that right now. If you want to be friends, understand that men don't talk to their friends as much. You're juat there and it's cool to have you there, they are fine with that. He also needs time to decompress from being in a relationship with you, so give him that time. He'll answer you when he is ready.

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  • its possible that maybe he found someone else, and wants to treat you like the bad guy so he doesn't feel as guilty. that could be why he picked the fight

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