The worst day ever, why did he do this?

This is going to be lengthy. But I am honestly so beyond devastated I need real advice, as my girlfriends have not offered any they are just pissed off about it all. This guy I met about a month ago (it is such a short time I know) began talking to me. I admit I completely fell head over heels for him... I have never in my 21 years EVER felt like this towards ANYONE ever. I could be silly I could be me 100% with him. He goes to a University about an hour and half away from my university. We started to drive to see eachother a couple times a week... He would come then I would go to his see him. Literally everything was perfect, the sweetest guy ever and so amazing, so so amazing. He introduced me to his mom, grandma, and brother the first time I went out to see him, bought me dinners and gifts, treated me as his girlfriend and even better. I honestly thought that is where we were taking the relationship next. I am not the type of girl that lets anyone get close to me like or to allow myself to feel this deeply about another, but oh my god something about him, there was a connection that was so real that I have never experienced in my life and I noticed this the first time we went out together.
Today I was planning to see him for the night, he sent a text this morning as usual and was so cute and said he couldnt wait to see me with all the cutesy emoticons. I was in class, about an hour and half later I got a new message that was so long, and he was saying that he doesn't know how I feel but since we promised to be honest with eachother that he doesn't see it working out due to the distance factor. he said that his heart hurt so much to send the text, and it wouldn't make sense for me to come anymore because we would get closer and then it would be harder. He said he was teary eyed and so upset.
My heart is literally broken. Why would he act like he wanted a relationship and treat me in such a way and then decide this...
I have never been more upset about anything ever in the past and I seriously don't even know what to think or do about this. :(


Most Helpful Guy

  • Distance relationships are really hard.

    I imagine he was on the fence for the longest time about the issue.

    I know you probably don't want to hear this but I think he was being realistic! A two hour drive each time is a lot... your looking at 100's of miles probably.

    I don't doubt that he really liked you... and felt the same connection but each time he was probably projecting ahead, and going down every road and figured you would end up seeing less and less of each other.

    I know it sucks for you... but it sounds like he may be hurting too! Not all guys are dogs... he may have even looked at it in a very mature manner and said, this is going to be really difficult and no matter how we do this, I am not going to get the time I actually want to spend with you.

    It sounds like he is a really nice guy the way you describe him, so I think he may be trying to still be that nice guy by being honest with you spare you even more pain down the road.

    Correct me if I am wrong... perhaps he was a total ass about it... but that is not what I get from your information above.

    • This is your MHO by the way.

    • Thanks Gingerqueen 1234 for the MHO and @ ArchDruidMordred for the encouragement... greatly appreciated!

      Hope Gingerqueen 1234 that you are able to get past the funk and be happy again!

    • No, thank you! Seriously, thank you- this is the advice I was looking for and needed, I appreciate it all so much. :)

      And also thank you, I know that I will with time, it's just difficult now!

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What Guys Said 3

  • Who knows what his true motives are but that doesn't matter. Just sleep on it for a while before you try to make sense of what happened. You're too distraught to really make sense of it all right now. Break ups suck that's just how they are. Especially since he broke up with you while you are still in the stage of being in ecstasy when you're around him. Most people are this way the first several months they're in a relationship with someone.

  • Actually the worst day ever is when you're fired from your job, or, you die. Men shouldn't define whether your day is good or not

    • No I totally agree. :( Its so weird... I never thought anything like this would make me feel this low... It feels like the entire world is sitting on my chest and that everything is just chaos around me. :/

  • I had to go through the same thing when I was your age, except she was 2,000 miles away. In retrospect, ending it was the right thing to do. Long-distance relationships don't work.

    • 2,000 miles would be so hard, I cannot even imagine. I just didn't think that 88 miles was that far away. :(((

What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe he wasn't the guy he was portraying himself as? Maybe he didn't want to catfish you and believe me I have been a victim of getting catfished by guys who weren't themselves

  • He's no longer interested. If he really liked you as much as he said he did then driving 1.5 hours to see you would be nothing.


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