I'm between ex and his mom, what to do?

I recently split up with my boyfriend. We were in a ldr and I could not cope with him travelling for work. His mom took ill several times when he was last away and i looked after her. Things kinda came to a head and when he came back i was so angry and upset. I told him I could not accept him going away anymore. His mom is quite close to me and is quite fond of me. I told him I wanted to breakup a week ago. His mom rang me today out of the blue and said he has been really argumentative and shouting. I was worried about him being stressed and looking after his mom since he came back as he doesn't have lot of family. I told him mom we werent talking at the moment. After I spoke to his mom I reached out to him by text. I said if he wanted me to go and visit his mum if he needed a night off to left me know but that i wouldn't be offended if he didn't want me to. He has ignored me which i assume means he doesn't want contact. How should i deal with his mom if she gets in touch?


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What Guys Said 2

  • If you are resolved to end the relationship with her son, you must end the relationship with the mother. Go have a final visit with her and explain. Having a relationship with her gives you a link to him and you may keep falling back into the relationship with him. It sounds like you have two problems with him: 1) He travels too much. That is probably not his fault, he could do something about it if he wanted to, and it may change over time even if he doesn't take any action. 2) He isn't concerned about how that affects you. That problem is much deeper and I don't think you can fix that one.

    It is time to cut the ties, minimize your losses, and move on.

  • That was kind of you to unselfishly offer to help out, but you are under no obligation to do anything else. Losing the relationships of friends and family of our significant others when they don't work out is just the casualties that are a part of dating long term.

    You've done all you can do, and if he does call you and asks for help, then that's your choice. Also, if his mom were to call you and ask for assistance, that's up to you as well. But don't let her make excuses for her son or allow her to try and reason to you on his behalf.


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