I hear a lot of stories about two people being together, everything is great, and then one of them just stops being attracted to other one, the passion is gone and they break up. How can I believe in love if one can just stop being attracted to someone, even though that other person is still the same person they fell in love in the first place? If it's true that it's no ones fault and that people just change, how can I ever fully commit if there is always a possibility that this may happen?
Most Helpful Guy
Most people do not realize that romance is a matter of work just like everything else. Passion *can* be reignited, and I already wrote to someone in a passion dilemma. I'll paste what I said here. Evidence links are still on my profile because I'm a new user here.
"*Anyone* and I mean anyone, can reignite the fire of their relationship *if* they know how or are willing to find out how. Not giving up has a sort of magical power like that. I'm going to list some things I've learned via research to help you in this endeavor.
A :Workout with your partner, ideally in an exercise that gets your heart pumping (like running.) Psychologytoday website says "Exercise induces the symptoms of physiological arousal—sweaty hands, a racing pulse, shortness of breath. These symptoms mirror, in many ways, the thrill of romantic attraction. Interestingly, people can easily mistake the two and misattribute physical arousal for romantic attraction (Dutton & Aron, 1974)."
B :Increase novelty (IE, mixing things up, doing things differently or even randomly.) Stayhitched website says "Recent research by Arthur Aron, a social psychologist at SUNY Stony Brook, indicates that couples can recharge their romantic chemistry by intentionally opting for novelty in some of their time spent together. In these studies, couples who engaged in fresh activities gave their relationship significantly better satisfaction ratings afterward."
C :Fear. Google "The Capilano Suspension Bridge experiment" for the data. Basically, doing something fear-invoking like rising a roller coaster, watching a scary movie, or anything that makes you both scared, will increase your bond. Why? Because of attribution of arousal. The fear and passion response are very similar and experiencing the former with a partner makes you believe it was the latter, thus increasing your level of attraction to one another/passion."0