My ex and I broke up less than two days ago, I made it pretty clear that I wanted to end things before we sat down& talked. He has a substance abuse issue and is in denial about them. Duringthe convo, he expressed wanting to break up also (gave no reason, it was clear I wanted to break up with him and he wanted things to appear mutual) & wanting to remain friends. then I started to lash out, lost my temper, because he seemed not to care & because he offended me by wanting to breakup when I was nothing but good to him. Anyway, I ended up saying a ton of stuff I should have never said, about many things. worst I said was admitting that i had been talking to someone else for awhile now, andtold him how i was on a date (only a hour after we broke up) which i know was uncool. I had been talking to someone else, but I had not pursued anything and rejected his advances. Then he got mad, and told me that I was disloyal, and told me to go be with my new guy now that i had a new person to play with". He kept responding to me telling me to stop texting him, he was going to block me but I checked and he didn't. next morning I apologized, I explained why i lashed out and clarified some things, wishing him the best. i saw that he read it. Today I sent a short message saying that I always cared for him and still do, how i liked the sober josh i met, but couldn't deny the substance problem any longer, & i said if he ever needed me id be here. He replied, "For the sixth, maybe seventh time now, please stop messaging me. I Wish you and your new boyfriend nothing but the best. finalgoodbye."I just dont understand. less than a week ago we were making plans for the summer, making plans to go to games, to do stuff in the city, we had been talking about fall.. i told him on multiple occasions that if he didn't want to be to be with me i didn't expect anything committed from him, he said he wanted to be with me, it was more than just casual, and that I was important tohim. im so upset.. why?
i tend to be very emotional and get offended easily, so i think thats why that happened.
and yes, i wish he fought for me, but i knew he wouldn't. i just got upset, i loved the sober guy i met. it was just so sad to get to know him and see him put weed before his family, his relationships, school, :( oh well.
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I'm sure he meant everything he said before, but when you ended the relationship, that changed everything. Putting myself in his shoes, I would keep my distance from a woman who ended our relationship. That being said, you did the right thing to end the relationship. He can't have a healthy relationship with you if he has a substance abuse problem, and he seems to be the only one who doesn't see that.0