Did I make the right decision with my ex girlfriend?

I've been no contact with my ex for a month now. I've read a lot of stuff on break ups and going no contact for a bit is the best option to let both parties calm down and see what they really want. Last night my friend invited me to his moms birthday party just to get my mind of my ex because I still really love her. She has done a lot of shitty things to me which I take into account but it's almost all over ruled by my love for her. She was my first. Some of my friends say she's immature and yes she can be but she's 18 and I'm 20. Anyways last night while sitting there with my buddies she phoned me. And 3 days ago she sent me a message saying she missed me through one of her friends, I didn't respond to that but said that if she calls again I'll answer. She calls 3 times which I didn't pick up. Then she left me a voice mail for the first time. So I called her. She answers sounding extremely upset. She tells me she's been trying to contact me to tell me that her grandmother has recently found out she has breast cancer. I'm thinking shit I've been here for this girl for a year and a half to help her with all her issues and this is fucking serious. And I know her grandmother really well, and apparently it's gotten to more serious the past week. Then she said she really misses me and regrets the decisions she's made big time. I'm assuming she's implying the break up, and she kept repeating I really miss you and I did tell her I miss her as well. When we were together Everytime she phoned me upset I would go to her house and be with her, which I was so close to leaving this party to go see her. Then my buddies girlfriend came out and started being rational with me. She was saying that I Shouldn't be a little puppy dog, and come whenever she needed me, ur not her boyfriend anymore, she made that decision. So I set up a meeting date for next Saturday, so we could talk about our future? I told her to watch a movie, and keep occupied. Was this the right thing to do?
She was telling me that her mom was not around, and she can't really talk to her friends about the subject with her grandmother. I think her friends are really immature. She said I'm the only person she can really talk to you about this, I'm the only one who will really listen, I am a good listener. I just don't want to jump back into her arms whenever she needs me, she left because she wanted to be with other people. I do love her, which is why these decisions are so much harder for me.


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What Girls Said 1

  • I think that since you two had been together for so long you should be there for her. She trusts you a lot (specially since she came to you after you guys broke up). I'm sorry to her that you two are no longer together but a break up doesn't mean that you guys have to hate each other either. You two can be friends and I think you should help her through this. You never know, she may change her mind about breaking up with you too.

    • I totally agree with this although I don't know if I should get back together with her. She has said some pretty hateful things when she's mad at me. I do love her but don't want to end up in the same break up boat 4 months down the road or whatever.

    • Oh okay I completely understand. I wouldn't try to get back together with her. But since you love her I would still be there for her:)

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