My boyfriend always feels bad about himself?

He feels like he can't make me happy and that he is worthless because he can't fix my anxiety. Making it better and helping me during attacks isn't enough for him... and whenever we argue, if I say something or do something, he will over analyze it and take it out of context. Like this may be the most dramatic example, but I said I feel insecure sometimes with my looks and he said that he must be a bad boyfriend because he can't make me feel beautiful.
We are on the verge of breaking up because of it because I just told him if I make him feel worthless because of my anxiety attacks, there's nothing I can do and I told him to think about it but he said he would and that he just feels bad that he can't make me happy and that he's worthless and an idiot.
I mean I feel guilty because I feel like that's my fault but I don't want to lose hope. help?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's not your fault he feels that way, he's insecure. Insecurities are personal and usually exaggerated fears, the problem is you can't fix someone who's insecure, they have to resolve it at a point in their lives when they're ready. Even when a supportive partner urges them to confront their insecurities, it doesn't change anything. This type of person is a nightmare to date.

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    • But he isn't really a nightmare to date-I mean, i decided to confront my insecurities when I realized how badly being insecure affected others so it isn't impossible. I just want to know maybe how to help him

    • I want to talk to him about it but I don't know how to approach the subject

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 4

  • You can't fix someone's insecurities. Only they can do that. If being around you makes him feel like sh*t for ANY reason (including the ones that are his fault), the relationship has no future.

    That's not to say he couldn't just take some time, get over it, and then you could resume the relationship. But the way things are working out now, it' not going to last for anyone.

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  • If he doesn't love himself, he can't love you. He needs to be strong and supportive as you do to him. A break up is probably best so the two of you can work on yourselves and improve your issues.

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  • You shouldn't feel guilty but maybe stop putting yourself down so much esp in front of him

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  • Did you tell him this?

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